Happy Healthy Long Life

The Healthy Librarian's Plant-Based Vacation Preparation Primer 101 - How a Family of Fifteen (Omnivores & Vegans) Found Vacation Harmony at the Beach

 

Paddle Ball, Anyone?

 

 

February 20, 2012

hi all,

hope everyone is doing well. i think of all of the different things (jobs,kids,life) we're all doing and am amazed of the changes in the past few years.

life certainly goes on and we are certainly a strong group. so, here we are in 2012 and i'd love to get together w/everyone this year.

I'd like to get some feedback from all of you as to when would be the best time (personally, december is out)...summer comes to mind as does north carolina .

we really have time to put something together so let's get some ideas of where & when...you know we'll have lots of laughs, a few tears,good food & i'm sure a few beers, bottles of wine and who knows what else.

can't wait to hear from you-SOON!

love,

El (aka. kid,mom,mima,lis,aunt El,favorite sister-in-law)

Email My Sister-in-Law Sent out in February, 2012 to Our Gang of 15

 

 

A July Beach Vacation - By Popular Demand

 

If you received this post via email, click here  to get to the web-version with all the photos, links, & to share your own plant-based vacation travel tips.

Where did everyone want to rendezvous?

The Beach!

The Beach!

The Beach! 

Everyone responded.  Multiple emails & phone calls later we settled on the single week--July 21-28th-when everyone could get off of work.  

We settled on the location.  The South Carolina coast.  Affordable.  Family-friendly.  Low-key.  Beautiful beaches.  Gentle surf. Lots & lots of bike, walking, & running paths.  Within driving distance for everyone. Some longer than others.

We found three moderate-costing houses to rent (split the cost), all very near to each other. Two on the same street. Perfect!  

 

So, how did 15 people--ages 9 months to 62,  married & single, no-nesters, empty-nesters, full-nesters, hipsters & oldsters, meat-eaters & vegans, night-owls & early risers, exercisers & slackers, with lots of different interests--find vacation harmony, enjoy amazing gourmet meals & beachtime together & still find plenty of time to do their own thing?

• We rented three separate houses--kind of like "separate" togetherness.
• We didn't try to "do everything" as a group.  We kept our own schedules.  Got to the beach in our own sweet time (or not), when we were ready--happily intersecting with each other.  Easy, breezey, no-hurrying.
• We got together for potluck dinners on most nights--but not every night!  The 20- & 30- somethings had their own dinner together one night.  The 50- & 60- somethings went out to a cool vegan-friendly Rasta restaurant one night.  The single twenty-somethings had some night life.  The full-nesters enjoyed a date night out with "free" baby sitting.
• Every dinner had something for everyone.  About half of us are eating plant-based. The other half love their meat & fish.  Viva la difference!
• The restaurant-goers of the group, went "out-to-lunch"--it's cheaper, with no long waits.
• Everyone was on their own vacation time. Some of us walked every morning.  Some of us ran. Some of us took long bike rides.  Some of us kayaked & fished.  Some of us played golf. Some of us explored the local shopping scene.  Some of us (like 3) got up at 5:30 am to enjoy a beach sunrise & some beach yoga.  Some of us slept late.  Some of us got up early.  

 

Morning Walks

The Officiant & Best Person.  We Renewed Our Weddeding Vows Under a Chuppah Fashioned from a Sheet Held Up with Golf Clubs 

Circling the Bride & Groom Under the Chuppah--What a Treat to Do It with a Grandee

A Little Yoga on the Beach?

 

 

BTW:  My sister-in-law was 100% right.  We shared a lot of laughs, a few tears, good food, a few beers, & some bottles of wine.  Margaritas & Mojitos, too!

And more:  The Lab Rat & I renewed our wedding vows (after 40+ years); we all danced on the deck to my daughter-in-law's "Perfect Play List", we walked on the beach, boogey-boarded everyday, body-surfed, played bocci & paddle ball, biked, hiked, cooked together, and screened the Lab Rat's AMAZING tear-jerker of a video featuring over 40 years of old 8mm movies & pics of long-forgotten family memories.

Accompanied by the music of our lives: Harry Chapin, Johnny Cash, John Lennon, Beatles, Moody Blues, Four Seasons, John Denver, Lovin' Spoonful, Louie Armstrong, Weavers, Simon & Garfunkel, Temptations, Ellis Paul, Frank Sinatra and more.

Unplugged.  Being mostly "unplugged" from my computer for over a week was a revelatory & rejuvenating experience. What a blessing!  OK, I did check my iPhone occasionally (totally addicted0, & we used our phones to "synchronize" our meet-ups.  

But, no emailing. No keeping up with "the latest news".  No writing.  My computer was mostly untouched. The TV was barely watched.  

OK, all "the girls"  climbed into our king-sized bed one night to watch my SIL's neighbor's nephew (got that?) "mustache" wedding on TLC's goofball reality show, "Four Weddings".  And we watched the opening ceremonies of "The Olympics".

And sweet sleep was had by all!  The grandees took their naps like champs & slept straight through the night.  Mostly.  I got an amazing 8-9 hours of straight-through-the-night restful sleep every night. What's up with that?  

 

Plant-Based Vacation Preparation 101

 

Eating plant-based is a huge game-changer when it comes to going on vacation.

Everything's more complicated & time-consuming.  You can't count of fast-food, carry-out or restaurants. But, it really does get easier the longer you do it.  Now it's just something I do.

You have to pack your own road-trip lunches---if you don't want to get stuck eating a Burger King Crispy Chicken Sandwich & Fries---like we did on our first "plant-based" vacation to Martha's Vineyard, back in the Summer of 2008.  OK, we were newbies, back then.

Lesson learned.  This year our road trip lunch cooler was packed with Homemade Match "Chicken"  Burger Sandwiches, peanut butter muffins for Little Man, Green Smoothies, humus, pita bread, carrot sticks, cherry tomatoes, fruit, Heart Thrives, and McDougall Breakfast Cups for our overnight hotel stay.

Who wants to spend a lot of time on meal prep when you're on vacation?  No one!

And I did not want to spend my vacation in a grocery store & cooking for a crowd.  No way!

 I figured out ahead of time, with the help of Son #1, my sister-in-law, & the Lab Rat, a basic plan of what some of our easiest meals could be. 

• I got a list of vegan-friendly restaurants & the best grocery stores on "the island" from a very helpful HHLL reader who lives there full-time--and we enjoyed a delightful "meet-up" at her home!  More on that, later.
• We came up with a meal plan for the week.  Each "family" would make what they wanted for dinner & we'd share it potluck style.
• Breakfasts & lunches were on our own.
• Each family brought their own favorite staples.  We would shop for fresh produce on the island.  My sister-in-law & niece brought their entire weekly organic produce "shares" to share with all of us.  A huge gift to us all.

Our potluck dinners were fashionably "fusion" & beyond our wildest expectations.  You could NEVER eat this well in a restaurant!

Cooking together makes a huge difference--it turns work into fun.  And cooking with my family is one of life's pleasures.  If we didn't eat until 9:00 pm, it didn't matter.  We were on "island slow time".

The non-cooks in the group pitched in with the hard work of drink-making, shopping, schlepping, clean-up, table setting, & entertaining the kids.   Teamwork at its best!

 

 

My Master Shopping List

 

I shopped for the vacation staples TWO WEEKS before we left.

My grandson was going to be visiting with us the week before we left on vacation--plus, I still had to work that week.   I didn't want to waste a minute of his all-too-short visit traipsing around grocery stores.

I figured my best bet was to bring my own staples from home for the meals we planned on making.  Who knew what I'd find at "the island" grocery stores?  

Besides, once this vacation started--I wanted to spend as little time as necessary at a grocery store!

I brought along only the staples we'd need to make the following meals:

• Pizzas loaded with artichokes, roasted red peppers, mushrooms, & Field Roast or Upton's Italian "Sausage"
• Breakfasts of steel-cut oats (Chocolate Oatmeal--this converts easily from crockpot to stovetop cooking by cutting the liquid down to 2 cups of soymilk & 1 cup of water), Chocolate Chia Breakfast Pudding, rolled oats, Whole Grain Muffins & peanut butter (for the kids)
• Chloe's Artichoke & Spinach Dip
• Vietnamese Ba'hn M'i Salad/Sandwiches
• Spicy Sweet Potato, Corn, Black Bean & Chorizo Lasagna
• Black Bean, Cherry Tomato Guacomole Salad  (just ditch the oil in this recipe)
• Black-Eyed Pea & Sweet Potato Burgers with Buns (ditch the oil, & consider using Taylor's canned sweet potatoes for faster prep) 
• Sicilian-Style Orzo Salad with Chickpeas, Walnuts & Raisins
• Fixings for a taco dinner--Upton's Chorizo & Plain Seitan, Salsa, Beans
• Lunch fixings:  Tu-No salad, smoked tofu sandwiches, humus (Note: Tree of Life Smoked Tofu is not availabe everywhere, but it is fabulous & makes delicious sandwiches)
• Beach snacks. 
• Drinks.  Watermelon Margaritas.  Mojitos.

 

Click here for my Master Shopping & Packing List

 

The Beans:  Eden Brand Garbanzos, Black Beans, TJ's vacuumed-packed Black-Eyed Peas

The Spices & Herbs:  This basic supply included a lot of blends that work for multiple recipes.  Kelp granules, cinnamon; curry; Penzey's Cajun; Barbecue 3000 & 4/S, Greek Seasoning; sea salt; Trader Joe's South Aftican Seasoning Blend; Red Pepper flakes; cumin; vanilla; black pepper; ground fennel seed.

The Condiments:  Kalamata olives, capers, sriracha sauce, jarred roasted red peppers, rice vinegar, pizza sauce, chipotle salsa, nutritional yeast, ketchup, soy sauce, hoisin sauce, Olive Tap Lemon White Reserve Balsamic Vinegar (a gift from from SIL), TJ's Fat-Free Balsamic Vinaigrette, TJ's Sesame Soy Giner Vinaigrette. 

The Canned Food--excluding beans:  Taylor's Sweet Potatoes (nothing added),  chipotle peppers in adobo sauce, artichoke hearts, mushrooms

The Staples:  Eden-brand soymilk, 1 box of low-sodium vegetable broth, steel-cut oats, rolled oats, whole wheat orzo, chia seed, raw cashews, raw walnuts, Penzey's Cocoa, raisins, PB2, medjool dates, Starbuck's coffe

The Refrigerated Foods:  3 Sami's Millet Flax Pizza Crusts; Field Roast Italian Sausage; Upton's Plain, Chorizo & Italian Style Seitan, NaSoya Soft Tofu, 4 packages of Tree of Life Smoked Tofu (Regular & Hot n' Spicy); Chipotle & Regular Humus; 1/4 cup of Tahini for burgers; peanut butter for Little Man

The Breads, Buns, & Crackers:  Ezekiel Sprouted Corn Tortillas, Trader Joe's Whole Wheat English Muffins, Ezekiel Sprouted Bread, Alvarado Street Bakery Sprouted Hamburger Buns, Finn Caraway Crisps, Wasa Crackers, Mary's Gone Crackers (regular & caraway),  Pretzel Crisps (Sesame & Everything), plenty of Heart Thrives for emergency meals or snacks.

The Mixed Drink Fixings:  Tequila & Grand Marnier

 

My Must-Have Kitchen Utensils

 

I've been in enough vacation rental condos/houses to know that "you never know how well-equipped" someone else's kitchen is going to be.

If you REALLY have a favorite "must-have" kitchen utensil--just bring your own.  Better safe than sorry.

Here's what I packed:

• My VitaMix--we used it everyday.  Smoothies, salsas, dressings, chia pudding, humus, etc.
• A good spatula for the VitaMix
• One really good sharp knife (oops, forgot about this one!)
• A Zester & my favorite (I use it everyday!) lemon juicer (if you don't have one of these, get one ASAP)
• Measuring spoons & cups--I'm big on measuring ingredients!
• My mini-OXO angled measuring cup--great for measuring small amounts of liquid ingredients--including mixed drinks.
• The recipes I planned on making, & 2 cookbooks--just in case plans changed.  Robin Robertson's Quick-Fix Vegan & Chloe's Kitchen.
• Dobie pads for dishwashing.  My own favorite dish rags for counter clean-up
• Ziploc bags, aluminum foil--so glad I did.
• I really wanted to cart my Cuisinart food processor--but, I had to draw the line.
• Lots of freezer packs
• A couple of my fave plastic containers
• Kleen Canteens
• Coffee filters

 

Turns out, our kitchen was well-equipped with most everything we needed.  We even had a gas grill on the deck.  Figures!

 

Mixed Meals - Something for Everyone

 

DInner Out - Roastfish & Cornbread's Veggie Menu - My Roasted Portobello Sandwich

 Roastfish & Cornbread - The Lab Rat's Ultimate Vegetarian Po' Boy

 Marg & Melon Margarita's  

Chloe's Warm Artichoke & Spinach Dip - My Tofu-Hating Nephew LOVED This One. 

The Barefoot Contessa's Guacamole Salad (just ditch the olive oil--not needed)

My Sister-in-law's Stuffed Roasted Portobellos ala Chef Chloe

Quick Chipotle Sweet Potato Lasagna with Black Beans, Roasted Corn, & Chorizo 

My Sister-in-Law's Roasted Artichokes - First Time for Me

 Master Chef Son #1 Working on His Homemade Salsa

 

My SIster-in-Law's Easy Rice Paper Veggie Roll Bar with Something for Everyone - Vegan or Fish Eater

 

Asian Veggie Roll Ready for Eating - Three Dipping Sauces

 

My Niece & Nephew's Giant Loaded Salad

 

Fresh Grilled Fish for "Fish Tacos"

 

Taco Bar Fixin's - Rice & Beans, Guacamole, Marinated Cabbage, Salsa

 

Homemade Salsa, Homemade Creamy Chipotle "Cashew Lime" Sauce, Homemade Pickled Hot Peppers

 

Asian Veggie Roll, Stuffed Veggie Taco, & Salad

 

"Not Your Carry-Out Pizza" - Roasted Garlic, Fresh Basil, Caramelized Onions, Roasted Red Peppers, Mushrooms, Artichoke Hearts, Sauteed Spinach, Kalamata Olives & Field Roast Italian "Sausage"

"Pizza Joint" Take-Out Pizza for the Meat & Cheese Lovers in the Family

 

 

Tu-No to Feed a Crowd  - Enjoyed by Miss Bean the Nine-Month Old & Omnivore Son #2

 

Better Forget About Restaurants with a Crowd of Fifteen - We Hit the Harborside Picnic Tables for Live Music, a Pre-Dinner Beer & Plenty of Runaround Space for the Kids

 

Ba'hn M'i Salad/Sandwiches with Cabbage, Cucumbers, Carrots, Lime, Hoisin Sauce, Upton's Chorizo & Plain Seitan & a Crusty Baguette

Sauteed Swiss Chard with Onions & Ginger

My Sister-in-Law's Cinnamon Roasted Organic Acorn Squash  

My Nephews' Fresh Catch - Grilled Spotted Seatrout

My Sister-in-Law's Gazpacho with Sami's Millet-Flax Croutons

Your Won't Find This Combo in Any Restaurant:  My Dinner Plate - Ba'han M'i, Gazpacho, Roasted Acorn Squash, & Swiss Chard

 

Lots of Spicy Black-Eyed Pea & Sweet Potato Burgers

Roasted Red-Skin Potatoes with Garlic, Onions, & Penzey's Cajun & 4S Seasoning

Burgers & Fries Topped with Guacamole & Creamy Chipotle Dressing

 

Breakfast at My Sister-in-Law's - Banana-Blueberry Oat Breakfast Bake & Fresh Fruit

 

Vacation Harmony?  I Think We Pulled It Off.  I'm Game for the Sequel!

 

Please forgive my family photo-sharing indulgences!  Thanks for your patience!  I totally understand, how annoying this must be.  

 

Now--please share where you went this summer, and your own tips for helping to make plant-based vacation travel as easy as possible!

This is a work in progress for all of us.

Road Trip! Plus the Healthy Librarian's Enlightened Spicy, Sweet, & Savory Sicilian Orzo ala Quick-Fix Vegan - Two Ways - Esselstyn-Style or Plant-Strong

 

No-Oil Sicilian-Style Orzo Salad with Toasted Walnuts & Raisins

 

If you received this post via email click here to get to the web version with all the links or to leave a comment.

 

July has been a crazy whirlwind of activity.

August promises to be more of the same.  Ah, summer!  

Our newbie three-year old grandson just spent his first week ever without his mom & dad,  visiting with his Oma & Poppy (H.L. & the Lab Rat).  Such a treat for all of us.

And then we all got to drive 14+ hours to vacation with our far-flung kids, plus the Florida & Georgia relatives.  A real family reunion.  

Oma, Poppy, & Little Man all valiantly survived the long car ride, thanks to many rounds of singing Little Bunny Foo-Foo, the Black Bean Burger Platter at Chilis, & the Little Man's first hotel do-it-yourself waffle-maker breakfast.  He loved it!

The Sube's air-conditioning mysteriously died two hours before we reached the beach--and it was 90+ degrees. Lucky us.

 

 

Baking Up Healthy-ish Zucchini Chocolate Chip Walnut Bread

 

The Road Trip Lunch at the Rest Stop - Homemade Veggie Burgers, Fruit, Carrots, Hummus & Pita Bread

 

The Only Thing Close to Plant-Based was Dinner at Chili's - The Black Bean Burger Platter - Yes, We Ate the Fries

 

Hotel Breakfast Buffet Heaven for This Three-Year Old - The Waffle Maker!  Please Don't Judge Us

 

Our Subaru was expertly packed to the gills by the Lab Rat--loaded with boogie boards, beach chairs, a Potty Chair, a porta-potty, a Pack-n-Play, a VitaMix, 2 coolers, cars, picture books, & loads of food.  

Whew!  I'm finally back from a fantastic family beach vacation and I can't wait to share the story of how 15 people--from ages 9 months to 62 years old, married & single, no-nesters, empty-nesters, & full-nesters, hipsters & oldsters, meat-eaters & vegans, night-owls & early risers, exercisers & slackers, with lots of different interests--found vacation harmony, enjoyed amazing gourmet meals & beachtime together & still found plenty of time to do their own thing.

My family rocks!

 

 

Yes, I admit, I was a little worried that we could pull this one off & still feel like it was a real vacation. And, it totally worked.  Laid back.  Relaxing.  Good times.  But, that's a whole other post.

Gotta ease back slowly into the blogging groove with a short recipe post, first.  I've grown lazy.

I've been wanting to share one of my favorite new recipes, that I adapted from my Go-To cookbook:  Robin Robertson's Quick Fix Vegan.  

I've already made this four times--so you know it's got to be good!

I planned on making this while on vacation--but, I never had a chance.  Made it on the first night we got back home.   

So here you go!

Hope you enjoy it as much as we do.

 

 

 

When My Sister or Sister-in-Law Recommend Recipes They Always Rock!

 

Dinner on the First Night Home from Vacation

 

When my sister-in-law (who's an excellent cook) told me she loved the Quick-Fix Vegan's Sicilian-Style Orzo Salad I knew it would be a winner.  Couldn't wait to try it.  But, the dressing needed a serious re-do!

This salad is sweet, spicy, savory & satisfying.  No shrinking violet, this one.  It packs a flavor & nutrient punch & is perfect company fare.

I adapted the recipe to eliminate the oil, & I substituted capers for the kalamata olives.  To say the Lab Rat HATES olives, is an understatement. So does my sister-in-law.  Must be a family thing.

Here's my oil-free adaptation of Robin Robertson's recipe. 

I present two versions.  

• One with a dressing made with cashews.   
• One with a dressing made with soymilk & chia seeds.  

The taste & texture of both are very similar!  Both will work.  And ditch the toasted walnuts if you are on a strict Esselstyn Heart Disease Prevention/Reversal Diet.

 

Some of the Salad Ingredients - Ignore the Shallots!

 

For a copy of the recipe on a single page, CLICK HERE

 

Serves 4, generously

Salad Ingredients:

• 1 cup whole wheat orzo (substitute brown rice for gluten-free)
• 1 1/2 cups home-cooked garbanzo beans, or 1 (15 ounce) can, drained & rinsed
• 1 cup of grape tomatoes, cut in half (use your homegrown ones)
• 3 scallions, sliced thinly on the diagonal--green part only
• 1/2 cup of raisins or currants
• 1/2 cup toasted walnuts (optional), coarsely chopped  (yes, toasted!)  bake in a preheated 350 degree oven on parchment paper for 8-10 minutes.  Watch carefully!
• 1/3 cup of drained capers  (can substitute pitted, sliced or chopped Kalamata olives)
• 1/2 to 1 cup coarsely chopped fresh basil leaves
• 2 to 3 cups of coarsely chopped baby spinach leaves

Preparation:

1. Cook the orzo in a saucepan of boiling water until it is just tender, about 10 minutes.  Drain & rinse under cold water, and transfer to a large bowl.
2. Add the garbanzo beans, spinach, tomatoes, scallions, raisins, walnuts, capers or olives, & basil. Mix well.  Set aside.
3. Prepare & mix in the dressing of your choice.

 

Option 1--Cashew Dressing:

• 1/2 cup of raw cashews soaked for about 30 minutes in 1/2 cup water.  You can do this before you prepare the other ingredients.
• 1/4 cup of fresh-squeezed lemon juice
• 1 tablespoon of water
• 2 teaspoons of brown rice vinegar or apple cider vinegar
• 2 garlic cloves, roughly chopped
• 1 teaspoon sugar
• 1/2 teaspoon of sea salt, optional
• 1/2 teaspoon of ground fennel.  This is a MUST ingredient.  Can substitute whole fennel seed, if using a VitaMix--or grind in a coffee grinder.
• 1/2 teaspoon red pepper flakes (less if you don't like a lot of spice)  Note: add this after the dressing is made--you don't want it to be ground up or it will be too strong.
• 1/8 teaspoon of freshly ground pepper.  Note: add this after the dressing is made--you don't want it to be ground up, either.

Preparation:

1. Add the cashews with the soaking water, the lemon juice, 1 tablespoon of water, vinegar, sugar, garlic cloves, salt & ground fennel into a VitaMix or other blender.   Mix very well.  If you don't have a VitaMix, it may take longer to get the cashews a creamy consistency
2. After the dressing is mixed well, add the red pepper flakes & black pepper & blend quickly--you want the peppers to remain whole--just mixed in!

 

Option 2--No-Nut Creamy Chia Dressing:

• 3/4 cup of regular soymilk, I pefer Eden Extra.  Don't use a "light brand"
• 2 tablespoons white chia seeds, like the Salba brand
• 1/4 cup of fresh-squeezed lemon juice
• 2 teaspoons of brown rice vinegar or apple cider vinegar
• 2 garlic cloves, chopped
• 1 teaspoon sugar
• 1/2 teaspoon of sea salt, optional
• 1/2 teaspoon of ground fennel.  This is a MUST ingredient.  Can substitute whole fennel seed, if using a VitaMix--or grind in a coffee grinder beforehand.
• 1/2 teaspoon red pepper flakes (less if you don't like a lot of spice)  Note: add this after the dressing is made--you don't want it to be ground up
• 1/8 teaspoon of freshly ground pepper.  Note: add this after the dressing is made--you don't want it to be ground up

Preparation:

1. Add the soymilk, chia seed, lemon juice, vinegar, garlic cloves, sugar, sea salt, & ground fennel into a VitaMix or other blender.  Mix very well.  If you don't have a VitaMix, it may take longer to get the chia seeds well mixed.
2. After the dressing is mixed well, add the red pepper flakes & black pepper & blend quickly--you want the peppers to remain whole--just mixed in!

 

No-Nut Creamy Chia Dressing for the Sicilian Orzo Salad

Nutrition Facts Healthy Librarian's No-Nut Dressing for Sicilian-Style Orzo Salad Serving Size: 1 serving Amount Per Serving Calories 51 Total Fat 1.8g       Saturated Fat 0.2g       Trans Fat 0g Cholesterol 0mg Sodium 302mg Carbohydrate 6.1g       Dietary Fiber 1.2g       Sugars 2.8g Protein 2.8g Vitamin A 6% Vitamin C 12% Calcium    4% Iron 2%

 

Creamy Cashew Dressing for the Sicilian Orzo Salad

Nutrition Facts Healthy Librarian's Dressing for Sicilian-Style Orzo Salad Serving Size: 1 serving Amount Per Serving Calories 95 Total Fat 6.5g       Saturated Fat 1.5g       Trans Fat 0g Cholesterol 0mg Sodium 285mg Carbohydrate 7g       Dietary Fiber 0.6g       Sugars 2.4g Protein 2.5g Vitamin A 0% Vitamin C 12% Calcium    1% Iron 3%

St. Louie Eats! Plant-Based, Everyday, Breakfast, Lunch & Dinner!

 

Cooking Up Some St. Louie Eats Treats with Oma

 

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Oma & Poppy Pay a Visit

 

 Practicing Those Spider-Man Moves

 

Eight busy days spent slacking in St. Louis with the Grands.  

Well, I wasn't exactly slacking.   

I was on the go from 7:00 am until 11:00 pm.   

The Lab Rat & I were in St. Louis lending a helping hand to our DIL, while Son #1 was hard at work in a small Mayan village in Mexico for 10 days.  

Bonus for us:  24/7 time with our just-turned-three-year-old grandson, and our eight-month old granddaughter.

Eight days without a minute of watching TV, reading the New York Times, catching up on my fave web sites, working on my computer, or listening to NPR.   Well, almost no electronic device time.  

What I discovered?   I didn't miss it at all!  I liked being disconnected from my computer.  It's impossible to divide my attention between what's on the screen--and my grandkids.   The news, the emails, the headlines would still be there (and they were) when I got home--but, grandkids grow up way too fast, and I didn't want to miss a minute of them.

Where did the time go?  

Walks to the park and playground, swinging on swings, sliding down slides, snuggles, going on a treasure hunt, playing trucks, a trip to the pool, reading pirate books, plenty of diaper changes, trips to the grocery store, lots of time to talk to my DIL, laundry, bath times, bed times,  dressing kids, drying tears, coaxing & cajoling a newbie three-year old, and feeding a baby & a toddler multiple meals & snacks every day.

Whew!  It takes a lot of time.

I also had an unexpected opportunity to share my Centenarian Strategies presentation to many of the staff at the St. Louis Jewish Community Federation.  Such an enthusiastic group--with lots of excellent, thoughtful questions. I really enjoyed sharing what I've learned with them, and I look forward to returning on a future visit to St. Louis.

The trip was delightful--and special--because of its ordinariness.  It's tough living so far away from the Grands! I miss all the everyday ordinary stuff.

Can't wait until July when we all go to the beach for an extended family reunion!

 

A Week of St. Louie Eats

 

What a treat to have three plant-based cooks in the house.  My DIL, the Lab Rat, & me.   None of us wanted to spend too much time in the kitchen, so we kept it simple and aimed for kid-friendly.   Well, good luck with that "kid-friendly" part.  That was definitely a crap shoot.  You just never know.  And it changes from day-to-day.

Sometimes we picked a winner, sometimes not.  No one is more food-fickle than a newbie-three-year-old. Getting them to taste a new brand of peanut butter, a different English muffin, or a new kind of hummus, can be a challenge, to put it mildly.

TIP from the Lab Rat:  Just tell them that all the baseball, soccer, basketball players, and even the golfers, eat what you're about to feed them.  That's why they're such superstars.   At least it worked with the new brand of peanut butter & English muffins.   Sometimes the Lab Rat is a genius!

 

My DIL's Go-To Plant-Based Cookbooks

 

• Quick-Fix Vegan.  Healthy, Homestyle Meals in 30 Minutes or Less.  Most everything's a winner.  It's easy.   No problem eliminating the oil in the recipes.
• Peas and Thank You.  Simple Meatless Meals the Whole Family Will Love.  Easy, kid-friendly.  Author, Sarah Matheny, does use oil & tahini, but her recipes are adaptable to no-added-oil.
• Appetite for Reduction.  125 Fast & Filling Low-Fat Vegan Recipes.   

 

Jambalaya!

 

The Lab Rat made dinner on Day #1.   This recipe is fast, easy, kid and grown-up friendly.   Yay!   The "food critic"  gobbled it up.    

 

Peas and Thank You Jambalaya with Field Roast Italian Sausage (Click here for the recipe)

 

No-Fry Falafel

 

My DIL chose this recipe from Peas and Thank You.   Another easy-to-put-together recipe that she adapted by eliminating the oil and baking the falafel on parchment paper.   She did use the small amount of tahini in the recipe.  Cook's choice.  She also used fresh dill, instead of dried, in her Tzatziki Sauce and she left out the Veganaise.  The sauce is fabulous & we used the leftovers as a delicious salad dressing, a dip for baby carrots & on top of the Spicy Tempeh Tacos.   The "little food critic" in the house refused to even taste the falafel--at least this time.  More for us grown-ups.

 

Peas & Thank You No-Fry Falafel with Tzatziki Sauce (click here for the recipe)

 

 Chipotle Lime Tempeh Tacos

 

Another DIL creation and the "food critic" in the house LOVED these.  We suspect the taco shells might have had something to do with that.  But, who cares?  

*Cook's Notes: You can also use sprouted grain tortillas, or softened corn tortillas instead of fried shells--or try softening corn tortillas in the microwave & then baking them draped over the slats in the oven rack. No-fry taco shells!

These tacos are spicy, so decrease the chipotle if you like your tacos less spicy.  Grating the tempeh is a genius idea for tacos!

 

Three Year-Old Approved Spicy Lime Tempeh Tacos from Peas & Thank You (Click here for the recipe)

 

"Tu-No" - A Mock Tuna Salad You'll Want to Have on Hand in the Fridge

 

My turn to cook--& I wanted something yummy for lunch.  We didn't even bother offering this sophisticated salad to our resident "food critic".   Didn't want to waste even a spoonful.   I love Cathy Fisher's (Straight-Up Food) version of vegan mayonnaise--and I think it will work well on all kinds of pasta or slaw dishes.

Cook's Notes: I omitted the onion.  Fresh dill would be a great herb option, as a switch from basil. Perhaps, capers or dill seed, too?  I used 2 teaspoons of kelp granules (not 1)--available at Whole Foods or health food stores.  I used Sea Seasonings Organic Kelp Granules from Maine and I added a touch of salt to my Tu-No. Loved the avocado with the Tu-No Salad.

You can easily cut the recipe in half. 

 

Straight-Up Food Tu-No Salad (click here for the recipe)

Curried Cauliflower Soup with Roasted "Cauliflower Rice" 

 

The DIL adapted this OMG-sophisticated soup from Quick-Fix Vegan.   This was better than anything I've ever had in a restaurant!   She roasted the cauliflower "rice" without a drop of oil, on a parchment paper-lined cookie sheet.  I can see making a bigger batch of the "rice" to sprinkle on salads--like croutons.  It's fabulous--sprinkled lightly with freshly ground pepper & salt as it roasts.   This recipe uses my version of "no-fat" coconut milk, which is made with 1 1/2 cups of soy milk (not low-fat) and 1 1/2 teaspoons of coconut extract.  Enjoy.  Not so fast--but, so worth it!

Quick-Fix Vegan's "Enlightened" Curried Cauliflower with Roasted Cauliflower "Rice"  (Click here for the recipe)

 

In-a-Flash Quick-Fix Tomato Tortilla Soup

 

My DIL suggested I make this for dinner on one of the days she went to work.  All the ingredients were already in the house--and she knew it was quick & easy.  What we were aiming for.  I ditched the oil, fiddled with the spices a bit, & added half of a jalapeno & some lime.  The recipe uses a cup of salsa, which is an easy way to kick up the flavor!

 

Quick-Fix Vegan's "Enlightened" Tomato Tortilla Soup (Click here for the recipe)

 

The Girls Just Gotta Have Their Chocolate Banana Chia Pudding 

 

My DIL & I both LOVE OUR CHOCOLATE!   We made this quick-fix recipe twice.  It's that good!  We enjoyed it for breakfast.   As a snack.   And for dessert.   Even Little Miss Bean (the 8 month-old) gobbled it up.

 

Chocolate Banana "Espresso" Chia Pudding (Click here for the recipe)

 

More Chocolate Girl Treats - Chocolate Espresso Hummus

 

The DIL whipped this up in a flash.  And we ate it up just as fast.   We're both suckers for healthy chocolate treats--and cannelini beans, dates & cocoa will do the job for any chocoholic!  The DIL makes her chocolate hummus without the stevia--and just adds an extra date.  This makes the best post-work-out snack, too. 

 

Chocolate Hummus (Click here for the recipe)

 

Easy Oatmeal Blueberry Breakfast Bars

 

Neither the Lab Rat, nor the "food critic" were interested in trying these delicious bars.  Who knows why?   But, my grandson certainly enjoyed making them--and when he grows up he wants to be "a cooker"!   The DIL & I LOVED these bars--and the flavor improves overnight--so hold-off eating them until morning.   It's such an easy take-along breakfast that includes oatmeal, blueberries, chia, banana, a little maple syrup, & flax.  That's it.

Cook's Notes:  This isn't very sweet, which is just fine with me & it makes an easy portable breakfast.  I topped mine with walnuts, because I LOVE walnuts!.  If you want it sweeter, consider adding some stevia, or more maple syrup.

 

I Like It Green's Baked Blueberry Oat Breakfast Bars  (Click here for the recipe)

 

Easy Banana Bread Oatmeal

 

I wanted steel-cut oats for breakfast one morning, and the pantry was fresh out of any dried fruit.  Hmm. What to do?   Bingo!   I chopped up 4-5 juicy pitted Medjool dates, smashed up a very ripe banana, & mixed them in a pot with 1 cup of steel-cut oats, some raisins, 1 teaspoon of cinnamon, 1/2 teaspoon of nutmeg, 1 teaspoon of vanilla, and 3 cups of enriched soymilk.   I like to make my oatmeal with enriched soymilk, instead of water, because I want the extra protein, the calcium, & all the other vitamins & minerals it comes with.  

We all LOVED this oatmeal--which makes enough for 4.   Honestly, it tastes just like banana bread.  You could even eat it for a snack or for dessert.

I even whipped up a second batch of this later in the week.

 

The Healthy Librarian's Banana Bread Oatmeal  Click Here for the Recipe

 

More St. Louie Eats!  

 

Want gluten-free crust?  Daiya vegan cheese?   "No-Meat" sausage?   Then Pi Pizza is the place to go!

As a treat, the Lab Rat & I decided to go "deluxe"--adding the Daiya Cheese.  Honestly, I'm not a Daiya fan. Next time I'd  "hold the cheese".  It's not needed.

PI Totally Vegan Deluxe Pizza (Daiya cheese, MATCH "Italian Sausage", peppers & onions)

 

 

 

 

 Chocolate Chia Walnut Bars (Click here for the recipe)  A Hit with the House!

 

 HGK's Kale Mushroom Enchiladas with Poblano Cream (Click here for the recipe)

Cook's Notes:  This recipe is a WINNER!  Both my son & DIL said, "This is the best dish you have ever made!" And they really like my cooking.  Both my sister & sister-in-law texted me with, "OMG!  This is amazing!" after they made it.  I've already made it three times and, trust me,  it will satisfy any die-hard omnivore's tastes. TIP:  You'll need more salsa verde than the recipe calls for!  Buy 2-16 ounce jars (not 8 ounce jars)! I used all the corn tortillas in the package.

 

 

St. Louis' Raw Vegan Restaurant - Pura'Vegan

 

The Lat Rat & I LOVED this restaurant!  And I definitely plan to go back.   It's fresh, unique, so delicious, & the presentation is spectacular, don't you think?  The owner follows Dr. Joel Fuhrman's diet plan, and although I didn't ask her, I'm guessing there wasn't any oil added to these dishes.  Nuts, avocados, seeds, yes!  We also scarfed down a delicious, albeit pricey, Banana Maca Cappucino "Milk" Shake.  Oh, baby, was that good!

 

Pura'Vegan's Loaded Tacos on House-Made Corn Tortillas with Pico de Gallo

 

 Pura'Vegan Raw Food Cafe

 

 Pura'Vegan's Sweet Potato Pasta with Lots of Vegetables 

 

Pura'Vegan's Enchilada's with Sunflower "Beans". Nacho "Cheese" & Veggies 

 

Pura'Vegan's Nut-Free Burger with Kale Chips

 

Another  St. Louis Restaurant with Plant-Based Options - Local Harvest

 

 

Molly's Pinto Bean Veggie Burger

 

Ahoy There Matey!

 

Going on a Birthday Treasure Hunt - X Marks the Spot

 

Digging for the Buried Treasure 

 

Yay!  I Found the Buried Treasure, Mommy!

 

Hiking in St. Louis with Mexico-Traveling Son #1

 

Little Miss Bean Just Sittin' Pretty

30 Lessons for Living - Wisdom from Cornell University's Legacy Project - What We Can Learn from "The Greatest Generation"

 

 30 Lessons for Living - Tried & True Advice from the Wisest Americans

 

Who wouldn't want wise counsel on:

• Finding the right mate and staying happily married for your whole life
• Raising children who turn-out well and enjoy your company
• Discovering work you love
• Growing older gracefully and without anxiety
• Avoiding major regrets
• Reaching the end of life with a sense of completeion and fulfillment

Isn't this the definition of a Happy, Healthy, Long Life?

 

If you received this post via email, click here to get to the web version for the links, the 30 Lessons video, & to please share your comments.

 

After I wrote my post about "Dirty Laundry, Toys, Books, Shoes, & Baby Equipment Everywhere! That's What Makes Me Happy - Lessons from the Grant Study & David Brooks' "The Life Reports II"', I heard from many readers, including Karl Pillemer, Ph.D., the head of the Legacy Project at Cornell University.

 

"Interestingly, a project has been going on for the past 6 years that systematically collects and shares the life wisdom of older people. The Cornell Legacy Project has collected and shared the lessons of over 1200 elders. There's a web site with archived lessons, and a book just published called "30 Lessons for Living." We can't have too many people working on this important issue! Here's the Legacy Project site:  http://legacyproject.human.cornell.edu   (The Healthy Librarian's advice to you):  visit this site for a treasure trove of wisdom)

 

That was two weeks ago.  

Late on Saturday afternoon, I literally ran into my public library before it closed to pick up some Mo Willems picture books to read over the internet to my grandson.

Before leaving the library, I took a quick look at the New Non-Fiction shelf.  And there it was.  30 Lessons for Living.  Tried and True Advice from the Wisest Americans, by Karl Pillemer. 

"Was this the same book I received a comment about two week ago? " I wondered.  I wasn't quite sure.  I get a lot of email.

I grabbed it off the shelf--and I still can't put it down.

This book is a gem.  A road map for living.  A guidebook written by seasoned travelers. 

I showed it to one of my wisest friends--the one I'd go to for advice.  She couldn't put it down either--and she immediately ordered a copy from the library.

I'm sending copies to my 20- & 30-something kids--but please don't spoil the surprise!

It's exactly the book I wish I had in my twenties.

 

When David Brooks of the New York Times recently asked the over-70 set to send him their own  "Life Reports"  , many of them told him:

It's too bad we have to make our most important decisions in our 20's, at the age when we're least qualified to do so.   (Healthy Librarian's comment: No way around this one.  In our 20's we often choose our career paths and our mates--decide where we'll live & whether or not to have children.  Crazy!  If only we knew then, what we know now--hindsight is 20-20.  It's the luck of the draw at age twenty--my advice is to seek counsel from people who are wise, happy, honest, self-aware, & successful--and I mean "successful" in the broadest sense of the word.)

 

What is the Cornell University Legacy Project?

The Legacy Project has systematically collected practical advice from over 1500 older Americans who have lived through extraordinary experiences and historical events. They offer tips on surviving and thriving despite the challenges we all encounter. 

The project, which began in 2004, interviewed senior Americans across the U.S--folks of widely different educational, vocational, religious, economic, & religious backgrounds.  But yet, looking back on their lives--many of them offer similar advice. 

In seeking out elders to interview, Karl Pillemer asked individuals & organizations to recommend people over 65 who they considered to be particularly wise.  His idea was to collect the wisdom of our elders before they were gone--and systematically harvest the advice they collectively share. 

Think of it as the most useful & fascinating research project you'll read.  A travel guide to a land called, "Life".

The project sought the wisdom of the Greatest Generation, those who have survived the most difficult of times--the Depression, job pressures, the Holocaust, challenging childhoods, World War II, prejudices of all kinds, illnesses, life's toughest challenges--and yet, went on to live rewarding & fulfilling lives. 

 

Who is Karl Pillemer, Ph.D.?

The Legacy Project is the brain child of Karl Pillemer, who started it six years ago, when he turned fifty.  And who could be more qualified to run this project?  He's a professor of human development in the College of Human Ecology at Cornell University, and Professor of Gerontology in Medicine at the Weill Cornell Medical College.  He's also a self-described, "self-help junkie"--who says that what he's learned from these interviews has changed his life.

 

Thirty Lessons for Living video  Click here if you don't see the video on the screen)

   

 

I'll say it again. 

This book is a gem--it feels just like having an intimate conversation with your closest friends or siblings--when you share your deepest concerns, worries, and secrets--and listen to their trusted advice.

Don't think for a moment that these refrigerator lists I've posted will teach you everything you can learn from these wise elders.  Not by a long shot!

Borrow or buy the book and snuggle up in a comfy chair & just enjoy every morsel.

Side Note:  I hardly slept last night, because this book made me think about my own journey, the choices I have made, and how my parents' lives have shaped many of those choices. 

I was thirty years old with an infant, when at age 69, my wise & gentle dad had a massive global stroke--that he survived for 16 years.  His illness impacted my entire family--especially my wise, kind, uncomplaining mom.  Click here to learn more.  My parents' lives taught me to:

• Act now like you will need your body for a hundred years
• Time is of the essence
• Say yes to opportunities
• Travel more
• Stay connected
• Happiness is a choice, not a condition
• Think small
• Say it now

 

 

Refrigerator Advice from the Wisest Americans

 

Lessons for a Happy Marriage - Great Together

 (My wise friend's favorites--and my own, are in red)

 

1.  Marry someone a lot like you.  Similarity in core values & background is the key to a happy marriage. And forget about changing someone after marriage.

2.  Friendship is as important as romantic love.  Heart-thumping passion has to undergo a metamorphosis in lifelong relationships.  Marry some for whom you feel deep friendship as well as love.

3.  Don't keep score.  Don't take the attitude that marriage must always be a fifty-fifty propostition;  you can't get out exactly what you put in.  The key to success is having both partners try to give more than they get out of the relationship.  (Read the Generous Marriage in the NYT's December 8, 2011--and take the quick quiz to find out how generous you are.  My husband & I both took the quiz--not surprised that the results were similar--although I think he's a lot more generous than I am.)

4.  Talk to each other.  Marriage to the strong, silent type can be deadly to a relationship.  Long-term married partners are talkers (at least to one another, and about things that count.)

5.  Don't just commit to your partner--commit to marriage itself.  Make a commitment to the idea of marriage and take it seriously.  There are enormous benefits to seeing the marriage as bigger than the immediate needs of each partner.

 

Lessons for a Successful & Fulfilling Career - Glad to Get Up in the Morning

 

1.  Choose a career for the intrinsic rewards, not the financial ones.  The biggest career mistake people make is selecting a profession based only on potential earnings.  A sense of purpose and passion for one's work beats a bigger paycheck any day.

2.  Don't give up on looking for a job that makes you happy.  According to the experts, persistence is the key to finding a job you love.  Don't give up easily.

3.   Make the most of a bad job.  If you find yourself in a less-than-ideal work situation, don't waste the experience;  many experts learned invaluable lessons from a bad job.

4.   Emotional intelligence trumps every other kind.  Develop your interpersonal skills if you want to succeed in the workplace. Even people in the most technical professions have their careers torpedoed if they lack emotional intelligence.

5.  Everyone needs autonomy.  Career satisfaction is often dependent on how much autonomy your have on the job.  Look for the freedom to make decisions and move in directions that interest you, without too much control from the top.

 

 

 Lessons for a Lifetime of Parenting - Nobody's Perfect

 

1.  It's all about time.  Sacrifice if necessary to spend the maximum amount of time possible with your children.  You and your children need to be together in the flow of daily household life and not just during planned "quality time".  (Read the story of my own family's shorter work week and how we had more time for the kids)

2.  It's normal to have favorites, but never show it.  Accept that you may have favorites among your children, but do not ever let them know.

3.   Don't hit your kids.  Discipline your children in a loving, respecful way that excludes physical punishment (no matter how tempting it may be in the short term.)

4.   Avoid a rift at all costs.  Do everything necessary to avoid a permanent rift with a child--even if it requires compromise on a parent's part.

5.   Take a lifelong view of relationships with children.  Parenthood goes on long after kids leave home, so make decisions when they are young that will lead to positive relationships in the second half of life.

 

 Lessons for Aging Fearlessly and Well - Find the Magic

 

1.  Being old is much better than you think.  Don't waste your time worrying about getting old.  It can be a time of opportunity, adventure, and growth.  See it as a quest, not an end.

2.  Act now like you will need your body for a hundred years.  Stop using "I don't care how long I live" as an excuse for bad health habits.  Behaviors like smoking, poor eating habits, and inactivity are less likely to kill you than to sentence you to years or decades of chronic disease.  Think walkers, wheelchairs, nursing homes, incontinence, dementia, oxygen, social isolation, and years of dependence.

3.  Don't worry about dying--the experts don't.  Don't spend a lot of time fretting about your own mortality.  What the experts recommend is careful planning and organization for the end of life.

4.  Stay connected.  Take seriously the threat of social isolation in middle age and beyond, and make conscious efforts beginning in middle age to stay connected through new learning opportunities and relationships.

5.  Plan ahead about where you will live (and your parents too).  Don't let fears and prejudices deter you or your older relatives from considering a move to a senior living community.  Such a move often opens up opportunities for better living, rather than limiting them.

 

Lessons for Living a Life without Regrets - I Can Look Everyone in the Eye

 

1.  Always be honest.  Avoid acts of dishonesty, both big and small.  Most people suffer from serious regret later in life if they have been less than "fair and square".

2.  Say yes to opportunies.  When offered a new opportunity or challenge, you are much less likely to regret saying yes and more likely to regret turning it down.  (from David Brooks' Life Reports II: Lean toward risk.  "Many more seniors regret the risks they didn’t take than regret the ones they did.")

3.  Travel more.  Travel while you can, sacrificing other things if necessary to do so.  Most people look back on their travel adventures (big and small) as highlights of their lives and regret not having traveled more.

4.  Choose a mate with extreme care.  The key is not to rush the decision, taking all the time needed to get to know the prospective partner and to determine your compatibility over the long term.

5.  Say it now.  People wind up saying the sad words "it might have been" by failing to express themselves before it's too late.  Don't believe the "ghost whispererer"--the only time you can share your deepest feelings is while people are still alive.

Sharing a secret:  Go easy on yourself regarding the mistakes and bad choices you have made.  A person with no second thoughts about anything he or she has done is probably someone who hasn't taken many chances in life--which is something worth regretting.  Forgive youself.  Be gentle with yourself.

 

 Lessons for Living Like an Expert - Choose Happiness

 

1.  Time is of the essence.  Live as though life is short--because it is.  The point is not to be depressed by this knowledge but to act on it, making sure to do important things now.

2.  Happiness is a choice, not a condition.  Happiness isn't a condition that occurs when circumstances are perfect or nearly so.  Sooner of later you need to make a deliberate choice to be happy in spite of challenges and difficulties.

3.  Time spent worrying is time wasted.  Stop worrying.  Or at least cut down.  It's a colossal waste of your precious lifetime.

4.  Think small.  When it comes to making the most of your life, think small.  Attune yourself to simple daily pleasures and learn to savor them now.

5.  Have faith.  A faith life promotes well-being, and being part of a religious community offers unique support during life crises.  But how and what you worship s up to you.

 

Please share your own hard-won wisdom of hindsight & life experience.

I'd love to hear what the 20-somethings & the 80-somethings think of these 30 Lessons for Living.  And everyone in-between.

 And a big thank you to Karl Pillemer for dreaming up this project & sharing it with all of us!

 

 

 

The Healthy Librarian's Three Tuesday Tips: Dealing with Temper Tantrums at Any Age, Buying BPA-Free Cans, & Movie Theater Contraband Popcorn

 

 

 

 

If you do not see the Temper Tantrum video on your screen, click here. 

 

 

"The trick is to get the child past the peaks of anger.  Once you do that, what's left is the sadness, and sad children reach out for comfort.

The quickest way past the anger--is to do nothing.  

Don't shout, don't hit, don't try to comfort the child.  But, when a child is screaming it's hard to do nothing.

[W}hen children are at the peak of anger and they're screaming and they're kicking, probably asking questions might prolong that period of anger.

When I'm advising people about anger I say, 'There's an anger trap.  Even asking questions can prolong the anger--and the tantrum.'

It's difficult for them to process information--they're overwhelmed.  And to respond to a question that the parent is asking them may be just adding more information into the system than they can really cope with.

It's better to keep things simple.  Issue short commands like, sit down, go to your room.

Understanding that tantrums have a rhythm can not only help parents know when to intervene, but also give them a sense of control."

-Psychologists Michael Potegal & James Green, "Screaming, yelling, whining, and crying: categorical and intensity differences in vocal expressions of anger and sadness in children's tantrums,"  Emotion 2011 Oct;11(5):1124-33-

 

If you received this post via email, click here to get to the web version with the links & the temper tantrum video!

 

Anyone Can Have a Temper Tantrum

 

OK--so, you don't have kids, or your kids are all grown.  You have zero interest in tantrums.   Why read this post?  

Because---the advice you'll find here can apply to your boss, your spouse, or your friends.  Anyone who's overwrought, frustrated, tired, hungry, angry and needs to vent!   Sure, with adults there's no kicking or screaming--but sometimes it's not a far stretch to substitute the word "venting"--for a "tantrum".

 

Toddler Tantrums Deconstructed

 

Would I be so ga-ga about research on tantrums if I weren't a grandparent--and dealt with a few toddler melt-downs myself?  Probably not!

But, you don't have to be a parent or a grandparent to experience the "horror show" of a full-blown temper tantrum.   Think grocery store lines, airplanes, or restaurants.  

It's happened to all of us--and it can make us feel as helpless as the screaming & kicking child who's having the tantrum.  And by the way--all kids have tantrums.

 

 "Small kids just have tantrums.  Some have lots of them.  Tantrums may be traumatic for parents, but they're mostly normal behavior.  So science hasn't paid much attention to them--until now."  (NPR)

But, if psychologists Potegal & Green are right--and I sure hope they are--there's both parental power & a sense of control when you know that all tantrums follow the same pattern--and if you know exactly when to ignore them, and when to intervene--a tanturm becomes easier to endure.  

 

"[W]hen looked at scientifically, tantrums are no different than thunderstorms or other natural phenomena.  Studying them as scientific subjects, rather than experiencing them like parents can cause the tantrums to stop feeling traumatic and even become interesting."  (NPR) Really????

 

My Temper Tantrum "Ah Ha" Moment!

When I heard the NPR story yesterday morning I had an AH HA moment!

Isn't a toddler's temper tantrum something we can all relate to? 

When we're REALLY REALLY UPSET or REALLY REALLY ANGRY (of course, I never am) we just want to have our say--and have someone listen to it--and not interrupt us.

• We don't want anyone to shut us up.
• We don't want any sympathetic coddling.
• We don't want to hear anyone's advice or solution to our problem.
• We don't want to hear logic.
• We don't want to be comforted.
• We just want to be heard, to vent, & release anger & frustration
• Only when we get our proper say, are we ready for hugs, comfort, & to listen to reason.

 

BTW--it only took me about 30 years of marriage to learn to just close my mouth & listen when my husband was having the equivalent of a grown-up's temper tantrum.   Plenty of time to talk & comfort after he's had a chance to vent!

Thanks to Michael Potegal of the University of Minnesota, & James Green of the University of Connecticut, who studied & recorded over one hundred temper tantrums--there just may be an easy technique for dealing with the terrible two's & meltdowns.

How crazy is this?  Potegal & Green devised a onesie with a wireless microphone.  Then they convinced parents to put the onesie on their kids--& hit the GO button, so they could record all that tantrum screaming, crying, wailing, & whining.

Potegal & Green say most temper tantrums follow the same pattern--the build up is quite quick--to a peak of anger--but then the child exhausts himself & what's left is a child who wants to be comforted.

 

The Play-By-Play Analysis of a Tantrum

 

NPR:  (commenting on the video) It looks like the tantrum is escalating.  But, in fact, what the new theory suggests is exactly the opposite.

Green:  (speaking about the child in the video) Once she's thrown herself on the floor and thrown something, or in this case, knocked the chair against the wall, we're probably on the down slope of this tantrum.  She's spent a lot of energy; screaming, yelling and now doing these physical behaviors.

NPR:  The scream was a peak.  No one can stay that angry for long - it's exhausting.  I asked Green what sounds he expected next from Katrina (the child in the video).

Green:  Probably something...like crying or whining.  There's been so much energy expended.  The child knows that they've been out of control.  That leads to a sense that they'd like some comfort from their parents.

NPR:  This tantrum from scream to whimper took only a minute.  But, Green & Potegal argue that no matter how long tantrums last or how often they occur, they follow the same pattern.

 

The Three Phases of a Tantrum

 

Phase I:  Yelling & screaming.  Associated with a high degree of anger.  That's how tantrums start, especially if there's a goal the parent has in mind that's different from what the child has in mind.

Phase: 2:  Physical actions.  Throwing oneself on the floor or throwing something.  This signals the downslope of the tantrum.  The child has spent a lot of energy, screaming, yelling & physical behaviors.

Phase 3:  Crying & whining.  This signals the end of the tantrum--what we see after intense physical behaviors.  And it can sometimes take only a minute to go from screaming to a whimper.  Only now is the child ready to be comforted--and she's ready to listen to mom or dad.

But, no matter how long it takes, from start to finish, all tantrums follow the same pattern!

Learn more:

1. Read the NPR "What's Behind a Temper Tantrum transcript here.

2. Listen to the NPR "What's Behind a Temper Tantrum" radio show here.

3. Access Potegal's & Green's article in Emotion here.

 

 

Look Right Here for BPA-Free Cans or Containers

 

The Go-To Safe Brands:  Eden Beans, Muir Glen Canned Tomatoes (started in January 2011), & Foods Packaged in Tetra-Paks or Glass

 

Just the facts, folks.

BPA is bad news.  I'm not going to get into all the nasty details of how this endocrine disruptor can be damaging to pregnant women, fetuses, babies, & children--or how, as a hormone disruptor it's been linked to breast & prostate cancers, attention-deficit disorder, behavioral problems, & even diabetes.

That's all old news.

But, here's the new deal, you might have missed.  BPA isn't just in plastic bottles--it's also in the linings of many cans--to prevent corrosion.  In fact, until recently, it was found in the linings of practically all canned tomato products.   That's now changed, because Muir Glen Organics recently started using BPA-free cans for its tomatoes.  Learn more below.

 

Here's what my friend Fran recently sent me from 7 Foods Experts Won't Eat (and just so you know--Dr. Fredrick vom Saal is THE BPA expert in the US).

 

Why You Should Avoid Canned Tomatoes (until recently, that is!!)

The Expert: Fredrick vom Saal, PhD, an endocrinologist at the University of Missouri who studies bisphenol-A.

The Situation: The resin linings of tin cans contain bisphenol-A, a synthetic estrogen that has been linked to ailments ranging from reproductive problems to heart disease, diabetes, and obesity.

Unfortunately, acidity (a prominent characteristic of tomatoes) causes BPA to leach into your food. Studies show that the BPA in most people’s body exceeds the amount that suppresses sperm production or causes chromosomal damage to the eggs of animals.

“You can get 50 mcg of BPA per liter out of a tomato can, and that’s a level that is going to impact people, particularly the young,” says vom Saal. “I won’t go near canned tomatoes.”

The Solution: Choose tomatoes in glass bottles (which do not need resin linings), such as the brands Bionaturae and Coluccio. You can also get several types in Tetra Pak boxes, like Trader Joe’s and Pomi.  (and Muir Glen tomatoes canned after 1/11)

 Muir Glen Canned Tomatoes

Last Friday afternoon I waited  on the phone for 45 minutes in order to talk to a Muir Glen customer service rep to find out if Muir Glen tomatoes are really BPA-Free. 

To date, there is nothing on their label to indicate that they are BPA-free.  So I wanted to hear it from a company representative.

Here's the scoop:

• All Muir Glen tomatoes packaged since January 2011 are now in BPA-free cans.
• The company won't put the BPA-free labels on their cans until all the old stock is off the shelf.
• So, how will we know if our cans are BPA-free, until the new labeling goes into effect?   
  

1.  The lining will be orange, not white.

2.  The expiration date will have a 2014 on it.  But..most of my cans have an expiration date of Mar. 2013, & they've all been orange on the inside--which means they're BPA-Free.  The 2014 date will give you 100% assurance that the can is BPA-free--but there are 2013 expiration-dated cans that are also BPA-free.

3.  Here's another clue.  If the can has a white-enameled lining with BPA, it will say so on the label, right near the nutrition facts.  Something like: contains enameled lining.

Eden Brand Beans

All Eden Brand Beans come in BPA-free cans.  Learn more about that here.

Tetra-Paks or Glass

All food packaged in glass containers or in Tetra-Paks do not have BPA.  Some researchers have concerns about the linings of Tetra paks--but, I haven't seen any research on that subject.

The BPA Health Risk Cliff Notes

Cleaning Up My Kitchen - Clearing Out the Bisphenol-A and Other Lurking Toxic Chemicals

The Consumer Reports Tested BPA Levels in Canned Food. It's Time to Ditch the Cans and the Thanksgiving Green Bean Casserole. Safe Levels Are Much Lower Than the FDA Allows

ADD, Autism, Hyperactivity, Behavioral Problems? Could BPA or Phthalates in Cans, Plastics, Carpets & PJs Be Responsible?

 

Here's the new research from JAMA, November 23, 2011

On November 23, 2011, right before Thanksgiving, when millions of Americans were going to open up cans of Campbell's Cream of Mushroom Soup, green beans, Durkee's Onion Rings, pumpkin pie filling, & cranberry sauce---one of the top-dog medical journals, JAMA, busted canned soup for it's sky-high BPA levels.   You can read a snippet of the article here.   

But, hey, if you had read my Consumer Reports post on canned foods, none of this would have been a big surprise.

Source:  Carwile JL, Ye X, Zhou X, Calafat AM, Michels KB,  "Canned soup consumption and urinary bisphenol A: a randomized crossover trial,"  JAMA  2011 Nov 23;306(20):2218-20.

The New York Times on BPA in Cans

 

If you want a quick summary of the JAMA findings--head over to the New York Time's article written by Anahad O'Connor on November 22, 2011.

 

"People who ate one serving of canned food daily over the course of five days, the study found, had significantly elevated levels — more than a tenfold increase — of bisphenol-A, or BPA, a substance that lines most food and drink cans.

The new study, which was published [on November 23, 2011] in The Journal of the American Medical Association, is the first to measure the amounts that are ingested when people eat food that comes directly out of a can, in this case soup. The spike in BPA levels that the researchers recorded is one of the highest seen in any study.

“We cannot say from our research what the consequences are,” said Karin Michels, an associate professor of epidemiology at Harvard Medical School and an author of the study.

“But the very high levels that we found are very surprising. We would have never expected a thousand-percent increase in their levels of BPA.”

Dr. Michels noted that all the participants were fed amounts of soup that were smaller than what people probably would consume on their own.

“One serving of soup is a not a lot,” she said. “They were actually telling us that that wasn’t even enough for their lunch.”

But she also pointed out that the findings were probably applicable to other canned goods, including soda and juices.

“The sodas are concerning, because some people have a habit of consuming a lot of them throughout the day,” she said. “My guess is that with other canned foods, you would see similar increases in bisphenol-A. But we only tested soups, so we wouldn’t be able to predict the absolute size of the increase.”

 

Bring Your Own Popcorn to the Movies!

 

My Ziploc Bag of Contraband "Barbecue" Popcorn - Is It OK to Bring Your Own?

 

On Saturday, I worked all day--drove home, downed a quick bowl of soup, popped some popcorn in my hot-air popper to take to the theater--and headed out to see a movie.   The plan was to see The Way, but it was sold-out. 

We saw The Descendants instead.  All four of us gave it a thumbs up.  But, I still want to see The Way.

 

Here's how to make your own Barbecue Air-Popped Popcorn

• Use a hot air-popcorn popper. 
• As the popcorn comes out, mist it with water (yes, it really works & it's not soggy) from a water spray bottle, and at the same time sprinkle on Bone Suckin' Sauce Seasoning & Rub (or the seasoning of your choice)  It works a lot better than spraying the popcorn with cooking oil spray (which is what I used to do), with none of the fat!  The water just evaporates on the hot popcorn.
• If you don't like  barbecue flavor--just sprinkle on finely ground Morton's Popcorn Salt, or nutritional yeast.  Plain popcorn is pretty boring, in my opinion.

But, this is supposed to be about bringing your own popcorn.

My husband thinks it's unethical.   After all--I do have to "sneak" it into the theater. 

But, I say, it's not like I'd eat the theater's popcorn, if I didn't bring my own.  Are you kidding?

A medium combo (cola & bag of popcorn) at Regal has 1,610 calories and 60 grams of saturated fat. That's roughly the saturated fat of a stick of butter and the calories of two sticks of butter.  To get the low-down on fat & salt content of the movie popcorn you're cluelessly munching, click here.

 

 

Chef AJ's Popcorn Experiment--Sugar, Salt, & Fat are the Evil Trifecta

 

Here's why we love our movie popcorn so much!

1. Make yourself a big bowl of air-popped popcorn.  Notice how you can't keep eating it after you're full.
2. Now add salt to the bowl & notice how you'll eat more than if it were just air-popped
3. Now add butter & salt to the bowl & notice how you'll eat even more of it.
4. Now make some Kettle Corn--with popcorn, salt, butter, & sugar, and notice how it's impossible to stop.  Sugar, Salt & Fat--the deadly Trifecta.

 

With Three Tips--I've Got Three Questions for You:

 

1.  What do you think about the Green & Potegal temper tantrum research?  Anyone agree with my adult "temper tantrum" comparison? 

2.  Do you have concerns about BPA in canned food--or do you kind of ignore the whole thing?  I still bought canned tomatoes, so I'm glad Muir Glen made the switch.

3.  Do you bring your own popcorn into the theater?

 

 

Dirty Laundry, Toys, Books, Shoes, & Baby Equipment Everywhere! That's What Makes Me Happy - Lessons from the Grant Study & David Brooks' "The Life Reports II"

 

Post-Thanksgiving Laundry Bliss?? 

 

 

 Dirty Laundry. 

Enjoy exactly where you are now--whatever your age or circumstances.  It's OK to be young--and it's OK to be old. 

And, if you're so lucky, enjoy the piles of dirty laundry gathering on the floor from the kids and grandkids and company when they come to visit & bring their messes!

-Dr. George Vaillant, the Grant Study's  lead investigator for the last 42 years-

If you received this post via email, click here to get to the web version with all the links.

By 2:30 pm on this post-Thanksgiving Sunday, the last of my kids had headed out the door for the long journey home.  Car travel with the same challenges of everyday life.  Constant rain.  Terrible traffic.  A fender bender.  Crying, wet, & hungry children.

And my husband & I leisurely started the "Great Post-Holiday Clean-Up".

Thanks to Dr. George Vaillant, I've completely reframed dirty laundry, toy-strewn floors, poopy diapers, 10 pairs of shoes at the doorway, and messy houses to mean, "Happiness, joy, family, and good times."     Really!

It's not often that I'm so deeply touched by (& actually remember) the lessons of a long-running sociological study--but the Grant Study is one that keeps echoing in my head.   The picture of piles of shoes at the door & the piles of laundry in the basement is what does it for me.  This past weekend was no exception.  

Back in May of 2009 I summarized Joshua Wolf Shenk's memorable Atlantic essay about the Grant Study in "What Makes Us Happy? Insights from Harvard's Grant Study - Joshua Wolf Shenk & Dr. George Vaillant Answer In The Atlantic".    I just reread it.  You should, too!

 

"Is there a formula--some mix of love, work, and psychological adaptation--for a good life?  For 72 years, researchers at Harvard have been examining this question, following 268 men who entered college in the late 1930s through war, career, marriage and divorce, parenthood and grandparenthood, and old age."

-Joshua Wolf Shenk, in "What Makes Us Happy?"  The Atlantic, June 2009-

 

If Only I Knew Then What I Know Now

 

Eleven Grant Study Lessons for Twenty-Somethings to Ninety-Somethings

 

1.  Age 25-35 is the toughest for virtually everyone.  It's scary stuff--what will I amount to?  But all you need is to give it time--things will work out!  It's not about keeping up with the Joneses or how much money you're making.  (H.L. I keep reminding my kids about this one!)

2.  Emotional crises, pain & deprivation are "analogous" to the involuntary grace by which an oyster, coping with an irritating grain of sand, creates a pearl.  Humans, too, when confronted with irritants, engage in unconscious but often creative behavior." 

3.  "Pessimists seemed to suffer physically in comparison with optimists--perhaps because they're less likely to connect with others or care for themselves."

4.  Relationships Rule!  "It is social aptitude, not intellectual brilliance or parental social class, that lead to successful aging."  Warm connections are necessary--and it doesn't have to be from mom or dad--it can be with siblings, uncles, friends, or mentors.

5.  Relationships at age 47 predicted late-life adjustment better than any other variable, except defenses.

6.  Good sibling relationships.  Getting along with your brothers & sisters is especially powerful:  93%  of the men who were thriving at age 65 had been close to a brother or sister when younger.

7.  Between ages 50-75 Life Improves.  Altruism & humor grow.  The negative unhealthy behaviors start to diminish.

8.  Gratitude and joy, over time, will yield better health and deeper connections--but in the short-term, they do put us at risk, because they expose us to rejection & heartbreak.

9.  What's the most important lesson that Vaillant (the lead investigator) has learned from the study?  "That the only thing that really matters in life are your relationships to other people."

10.  Happiness is about playing and working and loving.  And loving is the most important of them all.  Happiness is love.  Full stop.

11.  Enjoy exactly where you are now--whatever your age or circumstances.  It's OK to be young--and it's OK to be old. 

 

My Morning Coffee with the NYT's David Brooks:  The Life Reports II

 

I planned to write all about "Feeding the Family for Five Days--the Winners & Losers in the Thanksgiving Food Fest".    No worries, I haven't given up that plan.  I still want to share the recipes that we liked best--and give you a "heads-up" on what needed improvement.

But, then I read David Brooks' column , "The Life Reports II", this morning--and I was on to a more important tack than food.

Life Lessons from folks over seventy. 

Notice some of the similarities to the Grant Study.

 

David Brooks wrote:  "A few weeks ago, I asked people over 70 to send me “Life Reports” — essays about their own lives and what they’d done poorly and well.

They make for fascinating and addictive reading, and I’ve tried to extract a few general life lessons."

 

It's worth reading--but, honestly, I somehow expected more.  Absolutely, read the Life Report of B. Clewly Johnson!!   His top ten lessons are all winners in my book! 

Here are David Brooks' 10 nuggets of gold:

 

1.  Beware of rumination.   Steer clear of obsessively over-analyzing every emotion, relationship, slight,  setback, or disappointment.   Balanced thoughtful self-examination is a good thing.  Rumination is not.

The ruminating essayists "often did not lead the happiest or most fulfilling lives.  It’s not only that they were driven to introspection by bad events. Through self-obsession, they seemed to reinforce the very emotions, thoughts and habits they were trying to escape."  (H.L. Very similar to #3 of the Grant Study lessons.)

2.  Sometime Self-Deception is a good thing.   Think of it as optimism. "Many of the most impressive people, on the other hand, were strategic self-deceivers. When something bad was done to them, they forgot it, forgave it or were grateful for it. When it comes to self-narratives, honesty may not be the best policy."   (H.L. I'm a huge fan of looking for the silver-lining.  Notice how similar this is to #2 in the Grant Study lessons?)

3.  You can't control other people.   One of Brooks' essayists, "David Leshan made an observation that was echoed by many: 'It took me twenty years of my fifty-year marriage to discover how unwise it was to attempt to remake my wife. ... I learned also that neither could I remake my friends or students.'"   (H.L. Amen to David Leshan!)

4.  Lean toward risk.  "Many more seniors regret the risks they didn’t take than regret the ones they did."   (H.L. I readily admit it.  I'm risk-averse, but have to agree with this one.  I've almost always been rewarded when I've taken a risk. Like in this post from 3 1/2 years ago: Worried, Nervous, Anxious, Afraid? Remember - Courage Comes With Practice!)   "There's no doubt about it---Everything wonderful & memorable in my life has come when I pushed beyond my fears, covered my eyes, held my nose & took a leap.  Well, on second thought, maybe not everything.  A lot of good things have come because I'm sensible, not a risk-taker, and cautious.  It's all about balance.  Courage coupled with common-sense.)

 5.  Measure people by their growth rate, not by their talents.  Live your life with relentless self-expansion.  I like the sound of that!  According to Brooks, "the best essays were written by people who made steady progress each decade."   Who wants to reach their peak in high school or college?   (H.L. I'm hoping I'll reach my stride by age 75.)

6.  Be aware of the generational bias.  This one didn't surprise me much.  Most of Brooks' post-70-something essayists "had ambivalent attitudes toward their parents."  It really was a different generation.  "Many writers mentioned that given their own flaws, they are astounded that their kids turned out so well."  (H.L.  I agree with them--and many of my friends say the same about their kids.)

7. Work within institutions or crafts, not outside them.  "For a time, our culture celebrated the rebel and the outsider. The most miserable of my correspondents fit this mold. They were forever in revolt against the world and ended up sourly achieving little."

8.  It's too bad we have to make our most important decisions in our 20's, at the age when we're least qualified to do so.   (H.L. No way around this one.  In our 20's we often choose our career paths and our mates--decide where we'll live & whether or not to have children.  Crazy!  If only we knew then, what we know now--hindsight is 20-20.  It's the luck of the draw at age twenty--my advice is to seek counsel from people who are wise, happy, honest, self-aware, & successful--and I mean "successful" in the broadest sense of the word.)

9.  People get better at the art of living.  "By their 60s many contributors found their zone. Metaphysics is dead; very few of the writers hewed to a specific theology or had any definite conception of a divine order, though vague but uplifting spiritual experiences pepper their reflections."   (H.L. Exactly what we learned from the Grant Study.   Between ages 50-75 Life Improves.  Altruism & humor grow.  The negative unhealthy behaviors start to diminish.)

10.  Finding the balance between hard-earned realism, self-preservation, generosity, & being present for others in our life.  Brooks is disturbed by the contradictory philosophies many essayists wrote about.  "For example, we are told to live for others. But one savvy retiree writes, 'Don’t stay with people who, over time, grow apart from you. Move on. This means do what you think will make you feel okay — even if that makes others feel temporarily not okay.'”  Is that selfishness, Brooks wonders.  (H.L. I don't have a problem with these contradictions.  Common sense & balance in all things!  It's possible to hold 2 contradictory outlooks in your hand at the same time--and use them "as necessary".  Isn't this the same sage advice of Hillel?  If I am not for myself, who will be for me?  If I am not for others, what am I?  And if not now, when? )

 

I'd love to hear your feedback on both the Grant Study Lessons, and Brooks' Life Reports II.

Have any of them proven true in your life?  Or not.

Any guiding life lessons or rules you can share with us?

 

When Oma and Poppy Come to Town It's All About Playtime and Plant-Strong Cooking

  

There you go, baby!  A whole-grain roll, an apple, a tomato, and....

 

OK, all you grandparents, and future grandparents out there--here's what Dr. Tim Church wants you to know:

"To me, the most important element of exercise is healthy aging. 

There's no pill that assures that you'll be able to play with your grandkids, or to go duck hunting when you want to go duck hunting (forget about duck hunting--insert your own physical hobby here), or get up and down the stairs safely.

But, there is one strategy which we know works great for aging, and that is being physically active and maintaining physical activity throughout a lifetime."

-Dr. Timothy S. Church, PhD, MD, Pennington Biomedical Research Center, Baton Rouge, Louisiana-

 

And then there's Bill Clinton.  After his quadruple bypass & 2 stents failed, he went to Plan E (Esselstyn) and started eating an oil-free, plant-based diet in Spring 2010.  What was his biggest motivator for staying healthy?  To be around for his future grandchildren.

 

Click here to get to the web version if you've received this via email--better access to links & photos.

Which leads me to our wonderful week in St. Louis!  24/7 with "the little man". Playing, coloring, reading Sendak & Seuss a million times, bath-time, diaper changes, hide-and-seek, lots of ball playing, singing, swimming in the splash pool at the J, visiting "The Magic House"--St. Louis' AMAZING children's museum, cooking up a "plant-based" storm--and just enjoying the company of our kids. 

Months ago when my husband & I learned that son #1 was going on a 9 day work-related trip to a small Mayan village in the Yucatan (originally it was Guatemala), we offered to lend a hand with "the little man".   Yay!  Offer gratefully accepted.  Son #1 spent his week eating like a healthy Tarahumara Indian--beans, squash, & corn, while we ate plant-strong in the Loo.

But let's get back to Dr. Tim Church's advice about staying in shape so you can play with your grandkids, and be able to get up & down stairs safely--Believe him!  About the grandkids & the stairs!

It's three flights of stairs to get to my kids' apartment.  Up and down those stairs a million times, carrying the "little man", lots & lots of grocery bags, suitcases, gym bags, diaper bags, and a stroller!  And that whole winter bundling up thing, with boots, hats & gloves, and car seats. 

Good thing that my husband and I have been training years for this dream job!  You better be steady on your feet to climb as many stairs as we had to climb, while carrying a wiggly toddler & parcels.

Imagine an entire week of just playing, reading kid books, toddler-tending, and cooking?  Absolute heaven when you're a grandparent, not doing it day in & day out.  No TV at the "little man's" house, either.  And we hardly touched our computer.  No time for me to read any grown-up stuff, either.  It was living totally in the moment.  I slept like a baby.

 

Aren't Grandparents Supposed to Feed Their Grandkids Cookies & Ice Cream?

 

Darn!  This grandma knows too much.  Thanks to that big party pooper Dr. David Kessler, the author of "The End of Overeating", I know how important it is to keep sugar, fat, and salt away from the little guys.  If you want the best for your grandkids, how can you feed them junk?  It just doesn't feel right to get "the little man" started on chocolate chip cookies, ice cream, and chips.

 

"We used to think of food as something we ate to fill us up.  But in fact, much of the food we're eating--this trifecta of fat, sugar, and salt--stimulates us.  And we now see from the science--this highly palatable food is excessively activating the neural circuitry of our brains.  We now know...the reason we keep on eating is because of this sustained stimulation."     

Worry about the children!  Kids from ages 3-5 are eating constantly, all day.  Fat, sugar, salt.  "Once you lay down the neural circuitry that gets activated by highly palatable food--that stays down for life."   

-Dr. David Kessler, pediatrician, former FDA commissioner, former dean of the Yale & UCSF medical schools-

 

It was Plant-Strong for Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner in the Loo

 

I packed 2 Sami's Pizza Crusts in my suitcase for dinner #1

Almost Instant Pizza made with Sami's Crusts

 

Ann Esselstyn introduced me to Sami's amazingly delicious Whole-Grain pizza crusts, and since I had a stash in my freezer, I packed 2 crusts carefully in my husband's suitcase--mine was too full, of course!

Here's the deal with Sami's.  You have to plan ahead--the bakery is in Tampa, Florida, for goodness sakes.  But, if you call them by Monday or Tuesday, you'll get them delivered to your door in 2 days--freshly baked.  $4.09 for each pizza crust--minimum order of $25.00.  There's no carry-out pizza place that delivers plant-strong pizza in my home town.  Click here for order info.  Click here for my Knock-You-Socks-Off Pizza Recipe.  **I was surprised & happy to hear that my friend Cheri has been ordering from Sami's ever since I wrote about them in November. 

My pizza recipe is a no-prep, no-chop affair.  Speed is of the essence.  Jarred sauce.  Jarred roasted red peppers.  Canned mushrooms & canned water-packed artichoke hearts.  Bagged sun-dried tomatoes.  Jarred Kalamata olives.  My one Esselstyn-transgression is 1/2 of a crumbled Field Roast (vegan) Italian Sausage sprinkled on top of the whole thing.  It adds 1 gram of fat to a 2-piece serving.

We served the pizza with a salad for a quick delicious plant-strong kid-friendly dinner.

Big Tip:  Make an extra pizza while you're at it.  One pizza really does feed four--but you'll be thrilled to have left-overs to eat for lunch the next day.

 

Oh, yum!  Green Smoothie & an Apple Walnut Larabar.  I just love those green chin dribbles!

 

You never know what kids are going to like--or hate--but I decided to make a Green Smoothie for "the little man", anyway.   Oh baby--did he ever love it!  Of course, it's too thick to come out of a sippy cup, so we had to put it in an Elmo cup with a wide straw, suck it up, to get it started for him--and just wait for those magic words,  "Mo' joos, peez!"

Here's what "the little man" liked in his Green Smoothie:  unsweetened grape juice or only-cherry juice, lots of lacinato kale & spinach, a couple of carrots, a big handful of Trader Joe's Frozen Very Cherry Berry Mix, an apple, and a couple of clementines.   Add cold water & mix in the VitaMix.   I thinned his with a little unsweetened only-cherry juice.  

Can you think of an easier way to feed your grandkids vegetables & fruit?  For more info, and the nutritional breakdown on my green smoothies, click here.

 

Thirty-Minute Rice with Chickpeas, Asparagus, and Lemony-Tahini Sauce (you only need a little)

 

This is by now an old standby dinner for me.  Everyone loves it!  "Little man", my husband, son #2, my daughter-in-law, my friends, my co-workers, Mina and her family, Cheri & her family--and just about everyone who tastes it.  It definitely needs the lemony-tahini sauce to make it extraordinary, but don't worry, just a little goes a long way, and it uses only 2 TBS of tahini for enough to feed 6.  (next time I'm going to drain the oil from the tahini)  For my enlightened version of this recipe, click here. For step-by-step pictures, click here.

We served ours with sauteed spinach.

 

Mark Bittman's Miso Soup with Bok Choy, Soba Noodles, & Grilled Tofu

 

Another easy breezy meal in a bowl.  We served this with salad greens, cherry tomatoes, and red peppers, tossed with a dressing made with Hot Squeeze Sweet Heat Chipotle Sauce, thinned with some rice vinegar, and toasted sesame seeds.  Hot Squeeze works as a fantastic tofu grilling sauce, too!

We had maple-soy oven-baked brussels sprouts on the side.  For the Miso Soup recipe, click here. 

 

The Little Man's Favorite Treats

 

Toddlers are so fickle.  Larabars, Dr. Praeger's California Veggie Burgers, clementines, whole-grained toasted O's, apples, cut up vegetables, cherry tomatoes (go figure?), multi-grain waffles, Isa's Arabian Nights Lentil Rice Soup, spicy Italian sausage-flavored seitan with no-oil spaghetti sauce--were last week's favorites for "the little man".   At Thanksgiving he was all about my pumpkin fruited steel-cut oats.  Now, he's so over my oatma! 

The "little man" could not get enough of Ann Esselstyn's recipe for chocolate tofu mousse!   Neal's Frozen Banana Chocolate Milkshake was another "mo' peez" treat.

Mexican Chocolate (cocoa) Low-fat Tofu Mousse

 

Two summers ago my chocolate-loving friend Babs turned me on to Mark Bittman's so-called "healthy version" of chocolate mousse, made with tofu, real dark chocolate, sugar, cinnamon, and chili powder.  Amazing stuff! Click here for Bittman's version.

 I came up with this Esselstyn-approved version made with cocoa, "lite tofu", agave, cinnamon, and cayenne or chipotle pepper.  It's a pretty good stand-in for Bittman's mousse.  Picky son #2 & "the little man" both give it a rousing thumbs up!  Believe them.

Serves 3-4

Ann Esselstyn says: Be sure to MAKE this serve 3 or 4.  It is so good it is way too easy for it to serve just 1!

1 package "Lite" silken tofu (look for NaSoya brand if you want organic & non-GMO)  I used Mori-Nu for this recipe.

1/3 cup agave (what I used), or maple syrup.   I tried it with just stevia, to cut the sugar content--used 5 packets--and it tasted just fine.  Full disclosure: Some folks have concerns with stevia, but I'm a fan of the SweetLeaf brand.

2 tablespoons high quality non-dutched cocoa powder

1 tsp. real vanilla

1 to 1/2 tsp. cinnamon

A pinch of cayenne or more--or 1/8 tsp. of chipotle powder if you like heat.

Blend until smooth.  Use something powerful like a food processor or a blender.  It didn't work with a hand mixer.  Refrigerate 2 hours before use.  Spoon into small bowls & use small spoons.

Ann's variations:  Add 1/4 tsp peppermint extract & a garnish of a mint leaf.  Instead of agave or maple syrup use 2 TBS. of Raspberry syrup, 1 TBS honey, 1/2 cup frozen raspberries & blend.

 

 

Neal's Chocolate Banana "Milkshake"

 

1 large cut-up frozen banana, 1 TBS non-Dutched cocoa, 1/2+ cup of oat, almond, soy, hazelnut milk.  Whir it up in a VitaMix or a blender.  It's a good idea to keep a stash of cut up frozen ripe bananas in the freezer for spur-of-the-moment "milkshakes" or soft-serves.  Pack 1 sliced banana to a baggie for easy use.

Friday Night Dinner with Uncle Dan

 

 

Our Plant-Strong Friday night dinner with chili, challah, wine, & salad (IPAs & Jeni's)

You'll find the recipe for this All-American Chili with Lots of Kick That You Can Eat All Week Long, here.  It's Les & Tess approved--and they have very discriminating palates.

True St. Louis confessions: 

1.  Ice Cream.  We were all so good the entire week. When my daughter-in-law suggested we pick up a pint of Jeni's ice cream for Friday night dessert I wholeheartedly helped with the selection.  We decided on Gravel Road--Savory and smoky hits of almonds first, rounded out with salty notes for a satisfying finish. 

Bingo!  Dr. David Kessler's ultimate evil trifecta--salt, sugar, & fat--in every spoonful.  Thankfully, we only bought 1 pint--at $9.99 a pint--who could afford more?  We saved a generous serving for "the little man's" dad, who was coming home in 2 days from the Yucatan, so that left about a 1/3 of a cup each for my husband, my daughter-in-law, Uncle Dan (aka son #2) and me.   Zero for "the little man".  I wish I could say it tasted too sweet, too rich, & too salty.  I cannot tell a lie--it was fantastic!!  Glad we only had enough for mini-servings.  Eat at your own risk.  I'm staying away in the future. Visit Jeni's here!

2.  Pizza.  We also visited son #2's favorite St. Louis restaurant one night--PI's Pizzeria.  A favorite of President Obama's, too!  We were all set to order the vegan thin crust with roasted red peppers, eggplant, onions, & portabello mushrooms--and hold the cheese.  That is, until I noticed they had casein-free vegan Daiya cheese.  Truthfully, I would NEVER use this at home (it's made with 6 grams of oil per serving), but, hey,  it was a post-birthday celebration, we threw caution to the wind, and ordered it "with Daiya".   Not as good as my cheese-free pizza!  BTW, PI also has gluten-free crust!  Visit PI here.  Any restaurant that has vegan & gluten-free available is tops in my book!

 

The St. Louis Whole Foods Rocks!!

 

How many of you know that you can get deliciously-prepared vegan no-oil meals at Whole Foods?  It was news to me--but then I never looked closely at their prepared foods section before.

Everyday Whole Foods has hot soups, hot meals, creative whole-grain &/or vegetable salads, as well as a good selection of take-home meals in their deli case that are completely Esselstyn & Engine 2 approved.  No oil, no sugar, only whole grains, all real food.

But check the labels carefully!  Look for the Purple Signs that say: Health Starts Here.  Vegan - Oil-Free.

So, if you're looking for someplace to meet a friend for lunch, head on over to your local Whole Foods.  Too bad that every city's Whole Foods is different.  The prep food selection in my home town isn't half as good as the one in the Loo.  Go figure.

Here's what we feasted on for lunch.  Warning:  It doesn't come cheap.  We spent $9.00 each, but our plates were loaded high.

• Green Lentils & Spinach
• Stuffed Zucchini with Bulgur, Almonds, Currants, topped with a Spicy Tomato Sauce
• Black Bean, Sweet Potato Enchilada Casserole
• Spicy Vegetable Bean Chili
• Sauteed Garlicky Kale

Thank you Ann & Rip Esselstyn!  My daughter-in-law had made plans to see Forks Over Knives with a friend, but the St. Louis January 18th preview sold-out early--before she could get her ticket.   A big thank-you to Ann & Rip Esselstyn & the St. Louis Whole Foods (Marcia) for making it possible for my DIL to attend the film's preview  It's powerful, she loved it, and she's rethinking dairy for "the little man",  as well as ditching olive & cooking oils.  This is a mind-changing movie--and if you miss the preview screenings, watch for its release in March.  I can't wait to see it on the big screen next week.  For my synopsis of the film, click here.

 

St. Louis Play Time in Pictures

 

Library Time: Forget About Those Baby Books, "Little Man"  Heads Straight to the Preteen Section

Soon after I took this pic I was heading back to the car to retrieve the diaper bag I had forgotten to bring into the library--Green Smoothies, Larabars, and Dr. Praeger Burgers keep this little guy pretty darn regular.

 

Morning at the Open Gym with Oma & Poppy

Pint-sized Play Pizzeria at "The Magic House"

I've Always Wanted to Try This!!  The Magic House is for Kids of All Ages

That's My Husband Playing at the Magic House

And That's My Daughter-in-Law at the Magic House- We Did Not Want to Leave!

 

The Ambidextrous Artist Creating Uncle Dan's Special Birthday Card

A Little Snuggle at the Magic House

 

A Little Something to Eat After We Leave

 Before we  left St. Louis, I cooked up a batch of hearty burgers for the kids to stash in the fridge. Garbanzo beans, spinach, hot sauce, onions, chickpea flour, garlic and carrots.   When we returned home on Saturday night, I decided to make up a batch for us, too.   Topped with that lemony-tahini sauce--yum!

Stay tuned for this easy recipe sometime soon.  Time to sign off, eat dinner, & go see The Way Back--I brought the book of the original story home from the library for my husband to read 2 weeks ago--it's right up his alley--and lo and behold--the movie version is opening here tonight!  "Siberian gulag escapees walk 4000 miles overland to freedom in India."  BTW--he loved the book.  After you see this movie you will be sooo grateful for everything you have.  Like water, food, heat, and a bed.

 

 

 

A November Filled with Thankfulness - For Family, Friends, Good Health, Delicious Healthy Food, Opportunities to Learn, Laughter, Dance, Music and So Much More! I'm So Grateful!

Adam & Lisa's Wedding held at the Angel Orensanz Foundation--the former Ansche Chesed Synagogue Built in 1849 in New York City's Lower East Side

Ansche Chesed means "People of Loving Kindness"

"May you be as kind to each other in the years ahead--as you are today!  The secret of a good marriage is simple:  Be kind to each other!"

-The Father of the Groom-

 

If you've received this via email, click here to get to the web version.  Lots of links & photos.

November has been an amazing month filled with the blessings of family, friends, good health, learning, adventure, travel, dancing, singing, delicious food, and laughter.  

If you've wondered why I haven't posted much--it's because I've hardly had a chance. 

• November 9.  Heard Peter Lovenheim speak about his book: In the Neighborhood: The Search for Community on an American Street, One Sleepover at a Time.   A not-be-missed memoir with a message for all of us--get to know your neighbors--they'll enrich your life.   Read his New York Times essay to learn why.
• November 10.  A long overdue mah jongg game and "who-would-have-thought-possible-a-year-ago" plant-based potluck dinner with the gal pals--featuring a guest appearance from our dear friend "Nashville Fran".
• November 12-14.  A three day learning and plant-based eating extravaganza at the Wellness Forum's Fall Conference in Columbus, Ohio.  Dr. Mark Messina, a noted expert on soy; Dr. Amy Lanou, a nutrition scientist with expertise in bone health; Chef Del and Chef AJ, experts in delicious plant-based cooking.  You'll have to wait until Nov. 30th to hear all about it!  I've got fantastic recipes, cooking tips, plus news to share about the safety and benefits of soy, and how diet & exercise affect bone health.
• November 18-21.  The New York City wedding of Adam & Lisa, held at the Angel Orensanz Foundation.  Adam's the son of my husband's college roommate--and my college roommate--our friends for 42 years.  The wedding was a reunion of college friends and family, and my oldest son, who's a rabbi, co-officiated.  What could be sweeter?  My son co-officiating at the wedding of his friend--who just happens to be the son of our long-time frIends.  It was a weekend filled with everything that makes you happy to be alive--family, friends, laughter, tears of joy, lots of sunshine, music, dancing, conversation, exploring New York City and the Lower East Side.
• November 25-29.  Thanksgiving will be in St. Louis with my children, my gorgeous grandson, my sister, brother-in-law, nieces, and nephew.   And yes, I'm going to enjoy some pastured (grass-fed) kosher Heritage turkey, and my sister's award-winning Classical Cookies!

 November 2010:  Putting into Practice of My Strategy for Staying Out-of-Trouble After Sixty

When I turned 60 in January 2010, I came up with twelve guidelines that I figured would serve me well if I wanted to enjoy a happy healthy life after 60.  Here are the top 7 that combined to make this November a stand-out!

• Stick with 7-9 servings of fruits and vegetables a day.  Check out the "hot-off-the-press" pre-publication of the Archives of Internal Medicine article that just may convince you that getting 7-9 v's & f's is a wise daily strategy.   Click here for the article or here for the press release. The study followed 15,318 participants for 14 years and found that high alpha-carotene consumption from fruits & vegetables corresponds to a lower risk of dying from all causes, including cancer, cardiovascular disease, and diabetes.  Those with the highest consumption of alpha-carotene had the lowest risk of death from all causes.  But here's the catch:  alpha-carotene is obtained from fruits & vegetables, not from supplements.  Think carrots, sweet potatoes, pumpkin, winter squash, broccoli, and dark leafy greens. 
• A balanced exercise plan.   Yep, it's a lot easier to follow this plan when I'm home--and much harder to do when traveling.  With no gym in New York City we walked across the long Williamsburg Bridge and back, trekked all over the Lower East Side, the Upper East Side, and danced for at least four plus hours on Saturday night. 
• A plant-based diet with minimal added fat.  When we hosted our book club on November 6th we served all low-fat and plant-based fare.  The usual cheese, crackers, nuts, cookies, soda pop, ice cream, and cakes that are so easy to shop for and lay out, are now history at my house.  Instead, we served Red Lentil Mulligatawney Soup topped with Granny Smith Apple Cilantro Salsa, chocolate chip pumpkin and blueberry muffins, raw chocolate walnut chia bars, a spicy curried Indian spinach dip with lavash, sparkling waters, and Pinot Noir.   The Columbus Wellness Conference we attended was all about no-added oil and plant-based fare, and while in New York City we had a chance to visit BabyCakes Vegan Bakery, the award-winning Candle 79 vegan restaurant, and a hole-in-the-wall vegan joint called Tiengarden Vegan Restaurant, where we enjoyed broccoli, carrots, kale, soy bean curd in spicy black bean sauce served over black rice and quinoa.
• No time urgency.  Wherever we went this month we built in extra-time for traffic, subway, and plane delays.  Instead of arriving in Manhattan at 5:00 pm on Friday, at the start of the official NYC 10 days of holiday gridlock, we started our drive a half-day earlier than originally planned, so we could arrive at noon on Friday.  Negotiating the Holland Tunnel and the Lower East Side in a stick-shift Subaru is not my idea of fun--but with the help of a GPS and maps we made it without a NYC driving meltdown, or getting lost.  In spite of the many sights and people I wanted to see I tried to resist my usual urge to overpack my days.   Not always possible to do.  I usually think I can pack in way more than I actually can.
• More Dancing, Singing, Laughing, Playing, Schmoozing, and Mahjing.  Yes--that's exactly as I wrote it in January 2010, and November 2010 may go down in history as a month of DOING IT ALL--in spades!!
• Cultivate my garden of friends and family (OK I admit, this sounds so corny--but it's true).   I missed some of the key players in my life this month--like our Florida clan--but because of a lucky combination of circumstances I got a chance to see so many of both my local & out-of-town family & friends.  A November wedding and Thanksgiving certainly helped to make it happen!
• Once You're Through Learning--You're Through.  No doubt about it, this November has been jam-packed with learning opportunities.  Hearing Peter Lovenheim speak; attending a wellness grand rounds at work on Nov. 10 with Dr.  Tom Morledge lecturing about Nutraceuticals; attending the Wellness Forum Fall Conference with Dr. Mark Messina, Dr. Amy Lanou, Chef AJ & Chef Del; hearing Dr. Susan Love discuss breast cancer and bone health on the People's Pharmacy; reading dozens of articles and book chapters; and experimenting with a number of new recipes.  Lots to share when this November rush ends, and December begins.  Stay tuned!

 

 

Four or Five Hours of High-Energy Dancing & Singing with Friends & Family at Angel Orensanz

Healthy Book Club Treats--Chocolate-Chip Pumpkin Oat Muffins without Added Oil or Sugar

Red Lentil Mulligatwney with Granny Smith Cilantro Salsa--Served at Book Club

Three Hours Before the Wedding - The Groom & His Mom

My Sons, Daughter-in-law, and Husband

The Fam, Minus the Photographer, Son #2

 

The Bride and Groom

The "Boys" at their Annual Black Moshannon Camping Trip--that's the Groom on the Right, his Brother & Best Man on the Left, and My "Boys" in the Middle

What Could Be Better?  Your Kids Grow Up and Are Friends with Your Friends' Kids--Oops! Missing the Bride & Groom

Lunch at the Award-Winning NYC Vegan Restaurant--Candle 79

Candle 79's Black Bean Pumpkin Seed Burger with Caramelized Onion, Chipotle Ketchup, and Polenta Fries

 

Chef A J's Amazing German Chocolate Cake Filled with Chocolate Tofu Mousse and Made without Sugar, White Flour, or Oil

Our College Roommates--Our Friends for 42 Years--and Parents of the Groom

Dr. Amy Lanou Speaking about Bone Health at the Fall Wellness Conference

Part Plant-Based No-Sugar No-Oil Pastry Chef, and Part Stand-up Comedian, LA's Chef A.J.

  

Enjoying the Lectures and the Food at the Fall Wellness Conference

 

Wishing everyone a wonderful Thanksgiving Day filled with healthy delicious home-cooked food, family, friends, laughter, engaging conversations, and plenty of time for a nap! 

My Wedding Wishes for Everyone:

• Outrageous & memorable adventures
• Wonderful friends
• Good health
• Work that you're passionate about
• Enough of life's challenges to make you stronger, wiser, and kinder
• Kids who are above average, sleep through the night, are easy-going and lots of fun
• The gift of balancing your life, your work and your family
• Enough money to feel both secure and generous.  Not so much that you become out-of-touch & spoiled.  (The economy has certainly made this an unlikely prospect!)
• The knowledge that it's your friends, family & experiences that will bring you your greatest joys.  Invest your time and money accordingly.

To Life, To Life, L'Chaim, Be Happy, Be Healthy, Long Life!

 

Prepping for Thanksgiving - Ellen Goodman's Wisdom, Cooking a Turkey with Vegan Sides, the Helpful Husband, and High Chair Clean-Up

Real Life Adventures-Gary Wise & Lance Aldrich

"I'm hardly a Pollyanna about family life.  I know about the stress of the sandwich generation, trying to be all things to all bosses, parents, children, spouses.

I know that every family has troubles.  At some time or other, in some light or other, we all look dysfunctional.  But the fact is that most of us are functioning.  And loving."

-Ellen Goodman, "The Functional American Family",  The Boston Globe, November 24, 1994-

 

 

I have no business taking time off to write a Thanksgiving post--but right now I need a break from shopping, cooking, and scrubbing down a hand-me-down highchair--ick!  

OK, I cannot tell a lie--my husband handled the highchair clean-up duties--thank goodness!  And, he took care of the crib assembly--which now looks like it needs to be disassembled in light of massive of crib recalls. Oh well!

But my real reason for posting--I just love this cartoon & I want an excuse to use it.

Actually, I'm basically chilling this Thanksgiving--even though the gang is coming in from New York City, St. Louis, Cincinnati, and Pittsburgh.  The first guests arrive on Tuesday night.  Very late.  Midnight late.

Everyone is pitching in this year.  My husband did the bulk of the grocery shopping.  Poor guy had never experienced the Thanksgiving rush, and was clueless where to find "meatless" meatballs, Wheat-a-Bix, toasted pecan pieces, Lemonaise, currants, Larabars, red pepper spread, and more. 

His first call to me at work with "grocery location questions" was all jokes & laughter.  By the fourth call--this time I was away from my desk--he'd about had it. 

Here's the voicemail message he left me:  "I don't know where anything is.  There's no one to ask and if I don't hear back in 5 minutes, you're on your own with the shopping!"

In the end, he found almost everything--without my help.  On my way home from work, I picked up what he had missed.

Cleaning a Farm Fresh Turkey is a Great Reason to Eat Vegan

This year I got a pastured organic Kosher turkey from a nearby farm, about 7 miles from where I live.  Who knew what a project cleaning a "farm fresh" turkey would be?  

There's the rinsing, the pin feather-plucking--with my husband's tweezers--then ruining my knife trying to cut off the neck--the awkward seasoning maneuvers trying to turn a wet slippery 20 pound turkey.  Not my idea of fun.

Washing my hands about 20 times--every time I needed to open a drawer, a cabinet, sprinkle salt, pepper, paprika, rosemary, turn on the faucet, get a pot holder, open the oven--there has to be an easier way!

And the clean-up:  the grease, the raw turkey juices, the sanitizing of the sink, the counters, the cutting board. Who knew that easy grease-free clean-up turns out to be a good reason to eat plant-based?

Glad it's done.  All cooked, quartered, and in the freezer.

Except for the Turkey--the Gracious Guests are All Cooking Vegan

• Nephew Josh--a professional chef at La Via Vite--is bringing Red Pepper Bisque, and instead of cream he's using Tal Ronnen's cashew cream.  Click here for the cashew cream recipe.
• My sister--a professional baker--is baking a Vegan Chocolate Cheesecake, out of the November, 2009 Gourmet Magazine.  Click here for the recipe.  She's also cooking up a vegan version of an Oatmeal Crust Apple Tarte Tatin.

• My husband is making Tal Ronnen's Whipped Chipotle Sweet Potatoes and Martha Rose Shulman's fresh Cranberry Orange Relish.  Click here for the sweet potato recipe.  Click here for the cranberry recipe.

• Niece Anna is making vegan Mashed Potatoes.
• Niece Jamie is making a vegan vegetable tart.
• My kids are making maple-roasted Brussels sprouts with shallots, traditional stuffing, and setting the table.  They just don't know it yet.
• Is this going to be a low-fat healthy Thanksgiving?  Probably not.  But it's a special day!
• As for me--I'm sure I'll find something to do--like playing with my grandbaby.

 

Ellen Goodman's Wisdom.  "The Functional American Family", The Boston Globe, November 24, 1994

As it always happens, last week I randomly came across this ever-so-wise fifteen-year-old Thanksgiving column written by Boston Globe writer, Ellen Goodman.  I'd give you the link to it, but none exists. 

For everyone who is busy getting ready for Thanksgiving company, take a minute to savor this memory of preparing for a family homecoming.   Listening to the news, you'd think we're all in dysfunctional families.  Ellen disagrees with that assessment:

 

"I am up to my elbows in Thanksgiving prep when the phone rings. There are macadamia nuts to the right of me, pecans to the left. Flour and eggs are wrestling in my mixing bowl.

 I reach for the phone, cradling it between my ear and my shoulder and hear the voice of a television producer. She wants to know whether I might be available to comment on the decline and fall of the American family. A story for the season.

As I stand there, covered in batter, she rattles off the horrific list of stories that make her case. The South Carolina mother who drowned her children. The 19 toddlers found in a squalid Chicago apartment without food or clothes. The Pittsburgh couple who took off for two weeks without warning, abandoning three kids to teen-age babysitters.

 I listen to this familiar litany with an equally familiar sense of gloom, and then I decline. I'm sorry, but this afternoon, I promised to visit my mother. Tomorrow, the cousins are coming from California. The next day is our wedding anniversary. Tuesday, the young adults we call "the kids" are arriving. And there is a crisis in the care of an aged aunt.

 I hang up the phone, wiping pastry dough from my hair and savoring the irony that flavored this exchange. The irony of being too busy with family to comment on its breakdown.

 Folding in the last ingredients of my much-too-elaborate recipe, the annual proof of Stewart's (as in Martha) Disease, I wonder how many of us live with this duality. We are convinced that the great amorphous, generic American family is falling apart. At the same time we are occupied with family maintenance.

All year, I have heard a steady drumbeat of despair about "family values." The overwhelming majority of Americans agree - 98 percent in one recent poll - that other people are not living up to their commitments. Yet in the same poll only 18 percent believe they're irresponsible themselves.

 Everywhere I go, when people talk about what they value, the topic is their family. The coin of the conversational exchange between friends and even strangers is the state of their parents, their children, their spouses.

In our daily lives, we work at and for family. At 4 o'clock in the morning, when we worry, it's about our family.

Today, we have higher demands on ourselves as the parents of growing children and longer demands as the children of aging parents. But every morsel of evidence of success - did you read that 8 out of 10 high school juniors and seniors list parents as the people they trust? - comes lost in a survey of family woes.

What do we make of this duality? I wish the producer had asked me that. Some of it comes perversely from the very struggle to do a good job. The harder most of us try, the angrier we are at those who don't and at the price society pays.

But we are also reeling from something akin to negative advertising about the American family. The horror stories that make the front page, because they are so extraordinary, have slowly begun to be accepted as ordinary.

The radio talk shows, the Limbaughs and Liddys, provide an endless stream of antigovernment messages. But the Jenny Joneses and Montel Williamses, and the Sally Jessy Raphaels  present an unbroken stream of pathological families.

On any day, we can channel surf across this electronic byway from murderous mothers to husband-stealing sisters to proud mothers of teen-ager strippers. If Norman Rockwell's Thanksgiving family were on the air, grandpa would be a child molester, grandma a recovering drug abuser and the kids would bear sexually transmitted diseases. The abnormal is the norm.

I'm hardly a Pollyanna about family life. I know about the stress of the sandwich generation, trying to be all things to all bosses, parents, children, spouses.

I know that every family has troubles. At some time or other, in some light or other, we all look dysfunctional. But the fact is that most of us are functioning. And loving.

Somewhere along the way Americans have lost a sense of proportion. We've come to believe that I'm OK, but you're not, and that thing called The American Family is most certainly not.

This Thanksgiving Day has always been been more about family than food. It's the time when Americans travel through airports, highways, ZIP codes, in order to squeeze around the family table and discover how many adults can sit on a piano bench.

Standing in my kitchen, covered in homebaked proof of my holiday excess, I wonder if those of us who are connected by bonds of DNA, marriage, affection and above all else, commitment, can forget for a while that we're supposed to be falling apart."

Happy Thanksgiving to Everyone!

 

 

Everybody's Fine: The White Lies We Tell Our Parents about How Life's Going - Robert De Niro's Film about Family. See the Movie - Skip the Popcorn & Candy!

 

Everybody's Fine.  Robert De Niro's New Movie

Click Here if you aren't seeing the trailer or you're reading this from your email

 

Frank, the dad:  "I don't know what it is with you kids.  You always told your mother everything.  You never told me anything."

Frank's daughter:  "We tell you the good news.  We spare you the bad."

Frank's son:  "Mom used to say, 'Make your dad proud.'  I know you're not proud of me."

Frank, the dad:  "As long as you're happy, I'd be proud of you no matter what you did."

Frank's daughter:  "Really?  Really, dad?"

I got to see the sneak preview of this movie on Thursday night--and I loved it.  It was funny, touching, thought-provoking and certainly rang true for me as a daughter and as a parent.  My parents heard the good stuff, not the bad, unless I "was up against the wall".  As for my kids...well, I can only guess. 

Here's the pitch:

Frank Goode's a recent widower and a recent retiree who has worked hard all his life making protective coatings for telephone wires.  Why?  So his kids would have a chance at successful careers--making a living doing something they love--something that expresses their unique talents.  He was their ever-present coach--pushing them to excel.  Encouraging their successes--but maybe a tad-too-invested.

And it worked. One's a well-known  New York artist.  One's a musician and an orchestra conductor.  One runs a big Chicago ad agency.  One's a successful Las Vegas dancer and actress.  Frank's busting with pride.

But, when one by one everyone cancels for a weekend homecoming reunion, Frank decides to crisscross the country to make a surprise visit to each of his children.  And that's all I'm going to tell you.

Who is going to "get" this movie?

• If you're a son or a daughter who has ever felt that unspoken (or spoken) pressure to make your parents proud--and didn't quite buy into your parents' idea of "success"--you'll "get" this movie.

• If you're now a parent who only wants the best for your kids--you'll "get" this movie.

• If you're a parent who can't break the worry-habit when it comes to your kids--you'll "get this movie.

• If you're a dad, who leaves the nitty-gritty details of your kids' lives to their mom--you'll "get" this movie.

• If you're programmed to answer, "Everything's fine," when your parents ask you how things are going--you'll "get" this movie.

If you're old enough to know that things never go as planned, and the dreams for ourselves and our children are dreams, not reality--and that grown-up kids--well, they can take care of things just fine for themselves, thank-you very much!--you'll "get" this movie.

Is This Strictly a Chick Flick?

I had two burly guys sitting next to me, and I definitely detected some eye-wiping action.  Guys crying?  Big plus in my book.

As for my husband, whose tastes lean toward action, adventure & war stories--he loved it!  When I asked him if he thought it was a chick flick, he said, "No way!  I'd rate it a 10 on a scale of 1-10, and I think this is Oscar material for De Niro."

Hey, we're certainly not film critics.  Reuters describes this film as, "Robert De Niro movie a 'Fine" mess".   Well, fine for them! 

The Best Advice I Ever Got When It Comes to Grown-Up Kids, click here

I Knew That Movie Snacks Were Bad--But This Bad? Glad I Skipped the Free Popcorn!

Photo Credit: Stephen Schmidt

A medium combo at Regal has 1,610 calories and 60 grams of saturated fat. That's roughly the saturated fat of a stick of butter and the calories of two sticks of butter.

Check out the December 2009 cover story in the Center for Science in the Public Interest's Nutrition Action Healthletter.  Click here for the complete story.  Another reminder to skip the movie snacks.  I knew movie popcorn was bad--but this bad?  Yikes!

• Regal says that its medium popcorn has 720 calories and that its large has 960. But CSPI's lab tests found that those numbers were understated. Regal’s medium and large sizes each had 1,200 calories and, thanks to being popped in coconut oil, 60 grams of saturated fat.  That’s about as many calories as a Pizza Hut Personal Pan Pepperoni Pizza—except the popcorn has three times the saturated fat. Even shared with another person, that size provides nearly an entire day’s worth of the kind of fat that clogs arteries and promotes heart disease. And every tablespoon of "buttery" oil topping adds another 130 calories. Asking for topping is like asking for oil on French fries or potato chips, according to CSPI.

• AMC, the second largest theater chain, also pops in coconut oil but has smaller serving sizes. Its large popcorn has 1,030 calories and 57 grams of saturated fat. That's like eating a pound of baby back ribs topped with a scoop of Häagen-Dazs ice cream—except that the popcorn has an additional day’s worth of saturated fat. A medium has 590 calories and 33 grams of saturated fat; and a small has 370 calories and a day’s worth—20 grams—of saturated fat. (Like Regal, AMC reports calorie counts lower than those returned in CSPI's lab tests.)

• Cinemark pops in heart-healthy canola oil. A large has 910 calories with 4 grams of saturated fat; a medium has 760 calories and 3 grams of saturated fat; and a small has 420 calories and 2 grams of saturated fat. Though popping in canola gives this chain’s popcorn far less saturated fat than its competitors, it's almost as high in calories and has the most sodium—about twice as much as Regal or AMC. With 1,500 milligrams of sodium—a day's worth of sodium for most people—a large popcorn without topping from Cinemark will be less likely to clog your arteries but more likely to elevate your blood pressure. And while Cinemark uses a "buttery" oil topping similar to the toppings used at Regal and AMC, at some outlets, particularly in the West, it uses a topping made with real butter. That version has 9 grams—half a day’s worth—of saturated fat per tablespoon.

Photo Credit: Stephen Schmidt

 

Eating an 8-ounce bag of Reese's Pieces is like eating a 16-ounce T-bone steak and a buttered baked potato.

From CSPI's December 2009 Nutrition Action Healthletter